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| Sunday, 29 September 2002 |
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The forest is a bit quiet these days, now that summer is over and we are coming into autumn, which is really a beautiful season although these days you can't say when summer ends and autumn begins, and where autumn ends and winter begins. People don't even talk much about these things nowadays, which is a pity. It is always interesting, the movements of the sun and the moon and the planets. Titania has always been interested in these things, although she is a woman. The other night she spied Venus through the boughs of some trees and went all ga ga about it. 'Look! There's Venus! My planet... Aphrodite Venus!' she went on until Bottom got hooked on the verses Tit was improvising about Venus and began singing his own little ditties about not only Venus, but Jupiter, Mars, the good little Moon and even planets as far as Uranus. 'Oh Venus and Uranus! How happy we would be if only the two of you got married. Then you could call each other Uanus and Veranus. Wouldn't that be nice, now? "I've got it! I've got it! Two new planets in the solar system! Quince! Quince! Come here quick! Send this news item off to Reuters, AFP, Ita Tass or anywhere!' Bottom was rushing around our little front garden-yes, you could call a nice little clearing in the forest a garden-looking for Quince to despatch him to the nearest Communication centre to call the news agencies about his monumental 'discovery'. Quince was nowhere to be seen-he was probably at the Communication centre himself confirming the bookings for our flight to Sri Lanka-again!-on the invitation from that country to us to view the ICC championships being worked off for a special triphy. 'Oh, no! Not again! There's no end to this cricket thing. It's becoming a joke, it is.' 'The joke to end all jokes, and all the players jokers'. That was Mustard Seed and Bottom on the invitation to go to Sri Lanka to see the ICC Championship matches. Bottom was beside himself trying to find Quince when Puck put in: 'Quince's gone off to the Comm Centre to confirm bookings for our flight to the land where the sun never sets because they are cutting down all the forests and the World Body is gunning for them'. Bottom, who was always ecstatic when a foreign trip was in the offing, baulked at the idea of the trip to see the ICC Championships in Sri Lanka, saying it would be too hot in that country and he just couldn't bear the heat. 'How do you think the cricketers are playing day after day in the boiling hot sun?' That was Starveling who always loved the idea of travelling because he then had to make and sometimes even design clothes for the king and queen and the rest for the trip. They didn't know that I was listening to their comments on the forthcoming visit to Sri Lanka. We hadn't told them about it because Titania herself wasn't too sure of going because of the heat. She had had enough during the visit to that country to monitor the peace feeling. Came back with a blistering tan and the whole forest beauty team had to work on her for days on end to try to get rid of the sunburn. Titania absolutely hates sunburn and hates the tanned look, saying that it makes everyone look like Norwegians who spend half the year getting baked like baked beans. Tit doesn't like Norwegians or baked beans. 'Quince! Where is Quince?' That was Tit herself. She probably sensed that something was afoot about going to Sri Lanka and knew that Quince had been despatched to confirm flight bookings and other things for the long flight to the land of never-ending sunshine, and where rain is now a longed-for luxury. 'Oberon, my Oberon! I beg your permission, but I shall not be going to Sri Lanka because I simply cannot stand that terrible humid heat and I am NOT interested in their cricket'. Tit had seen me sitting at the bottom of the tree and had to talk rather loud to be heard. 'Don't worry, Queen Tit, we will be kept in air-conditioned comfort so we will not experience one split second of the heat, I said, trying to console her. "How can you watch cricket in air-conditioned comfort?", she rapped. 'Where we will sit will be air-conditioned,' I said in answer to her question. 'I can't trust that. They are always having power cuts in that country and the coolers will fail and it will be absolute hell,' she said. 'But I can't go without you, you know. What am I going to tell our hosts?' 'Just tell them that I don't give a spliced acorn about their cricket carnival'. 'But our Nazeer is out there'. I knew that that would be the trick. She loves Nazeer, calls him 'my Nazeer', would you believe it?' 'Our Nazeer is playing there? Oberon, we have to go. We just can't let him be there among so many enemies alone. We have to give him moral support, at least. Where's Starveling? Bottom? Puck? Call Starveling. He's got to get busy immediately on our clothes for Sri Lanka. Tell him to see me as soon as possible. I shall wear the exact colours of our uniform. In fact, I shall try something new and wear cricketing togs!' Oberon |
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