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by Vimukthi Fernando

Well, it is right here on our doorstep. That time of the year when we wipe the slate clean of old mistakes and start afresh. A new year and a new beginning. New workplaces for some, new houses for others, new friends and sometimes, even a whole new life... The new year, is a time that we reminisce on the time past, think of the times ahead and make decisions. And this we call New Year Resolutions.

'Resolve' to perform certain behaviours, and to abstain from performing certain others - change things in life to make it better. Perhaps, it is not the trend, to 'resolve' to change your life in this third millennium... where many regard it as 'old hat.'

But, new year resolutions, still stand strong in the lives of many years after it originated. In fact, it is more than 2000 years, since the tradition of new year resolutions began. For that matter, it was even before the advent of Christ. It was in Babylon that the first steps were taken.

An agricultural civilisation, Babylonian life was so much in harmony with the environment they lived in. Their new year began with the first new moon in the spring... And something the Babylonians 'resolved' to do as soon as the new year dawned on them was to return agricultural equipment borrowed during the past year from friends and neighbours!.

That's not a bad new year resolution. How many of us resolve to return those little 'borrowed feathers' in our possession? Most of our new year resolutions are based on the wish lists that we had perhaps all our lives. To stop smoking, save money, get rid of alcohol dependency, lose weight, change jobs, relax more and so on.

Sometimes we just make snap 'resolutions' such as make more friends, visit family more and the like based on 'holiday blues.'

New year resolutions, many of us joke are there to be made to break ! That most of us do more often than not perhaps proves this point. Some new year resolutions are abandoned the first week of the new year. And it's neither joke nor exaggeration to say some are shelved to be taken out the next year again.

But, .... how many of us know the basics of making new year resolutions? Research conducted in the USA, where more than 100 million Americans make resolutions each year, reveal that good planning, commitment and persistence are the three essential ingredients to get a well baked 'new year resolution.' A University of Washington study, of a random group of 264 persons revealed that 63% of the respondents keep to their resolutions for 2 months. Also 35% had made the resolutions they kept based on decisions or suggestions of change as early as May, the previous year!

There are some more keys to making successful resolutions. A person's confidence that he or she can make the change is certainly a plus point say experts, seeing resolutions as a change of behaviour. According to them, the initial commitment of a person to change his or her behaviour, is of high importance. Also, important is the continuation of the act despite the initial failures. Though not being able to keep to a resolution is discouraging, if you continue you finally reach your goal.

One helpful step could be to have coping strategies to deal with problems that might arise. "Resolutions are a process, not a one-time effort that offer people a chance to create new habits.

Keep track of the progress. The more monitoring there is and feedback received, the better a resolution is kept."

With a few tips on making resolutions and keeping them. We wish you success and fun in keeping your resolutions this year!.

Resolutions - good for any time of the year

* Call up a forgotten friend.

* Drop an old grudge, and replace it with some pleasant memories.

* Share a funny story with someone whose sprits are dragging.

* Pay a debt.

* Give a soft answer.

* Free yourself of envy and malice.

* Share your experience, and offer support.

* Find the time to be kind and thoughtful.

* Forgive an injustice. Listen more. Be kind.

* Apologize when you realize you are wrong.

* Try to understand a point of view that is different from your own.

* Examine the demands you make on others. Few things are 100 per cent one way or another.

* Lighten up. Laugh the loudest when the joke is on you.

* Be a friend to others, that's a sure way to have a friend.

* Be positive. Avoid malcontents and pessimists.

* Venture out, it may be risky, but, nothing ventured means nothing gained.

* Be optimistic. The can-do spirit is the fuel that makes things go.

* Read something uplifting.

* Don't abandon your old-fashioned principles. They never go out of style.

* When courage is needed, ask yourself, "If not me, who? If not now, when?"

* Walk tall, and smile more. You'll look 10 years younger.

* Don't be afraid to say, "I love you". Say it again. They are the sweetest words in the world.

How to keep up with those new year resolutions:

It should not be a hurried job, if at all you are making hurried resolutions give it a few days, a week at least.

* Select a few of the most important changes needed in your life. Don't try everything at once. It is a sure way towards failure. Better keep one or two resolutions than breaking ten! * Take one thing at a time.

Weigh the pros and cons. perhaps these could be written down. Think of obstacles, and threats to keeping the resolutions. Write them down.

* Do not set 'sky-high' goals. You will never reach them and end up feeling a failure. Set achievable goals. Not so very easy ones, but, those that would take you one step higher from the present situations.

Break your goal into different stages and set targets to reach those stages.

* Prepare - go out and search for things that would help keep your resolutions. If it is exercise, look out for gymnasiums. If it is relaxation, try to find out different relaxation techniques. * Write it down... word it carefully that it would not bring more stress into your life. Not "this year I am going to relax." That's a stress-inducer waiting to happen.

It forces you into thinking of the resolution as something you must do, not something you want to do.

Sound a little gentle "this year I'm going to explore different ways of relaxing." * Make it a part of your life - a constant reminder. Stick it up on the fridge, in your locker, wherever you know you'll see it.

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