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| Sunday, 20 February 2005 |
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Features |  |
| News Business Features Editorial
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Call it exaggeration by Amar Jaleel A middle-aged woman was a television addict. It always occurred to her that she could never survive without watching programmes on television. The only time that she did not watch television was when she was found fast asleep dumped in a soft sofa a few feet away from a television set, turned on. Obviously, she had a television set in her bedroom, drawing room, dinning room, lobby, pantry, kitchen, and bathrooms. To facilitate her viewing habits, her devoted husband had gifted her a watchman, a gadget she always kept abreast. She always dreaded how miserable life would be without watching television programmes. Once she went out on a stroll with her eyes fixed on the tiny screen of the watchman. She plunged into an uncovered manhole and went down the drain. When she was finally rescued after a week, what bewildered the rescuers was, that her eyes were fixed on the screen of the watchman, and she was absolutely unaware of her awful experience. Her only query from her devoted husband was, "What happened, Habibi?" Television to the middle-aged woman was alma mater. She believed, the knowledge of the world was stored in that electronic gadget, and it constantly emanated from it, and spread light, and wisdom among the viewers. She on her own learned a lot from television, cookery, stitching, gardening, healthcare, child-care, decoration, fashion, magic, hypnotism, religion, witchcraft, and so on and so forth. She ultimately became television-wise. She, in her own right, was a charming lady. No one from her captivating looks could make out that she was a mother of seven children, who by then had grown up, married and settled elsewhere, and gave birth to their own offspring. Many people thought, she was 'She' of Rider Haggard's novel. She, when asked to reveal the secret of her everlasting beauty, gave entire credit to television. One day it so happened, with a remote-control in her hand, she was simultaneously watching and swapping two programmes from two different channels, a programme on lustrous healthy hair, and a programme on chatpatay pakoray. Instinctively, she kept on taking mental notes. Later on, what she distinctly remembered was that gram-flour, besan was good for her hair. From the programme on chatpatay pakoray she retained that pakoras are always deep-fried in very hot oil. She prepared a fine paste of besan, and applied it to her hair. Thereafter, she poured a generous quantity of oil in a frying-pan, and put it on the burner. Meanwhile, she kept massaging her scalp with besan. The oil spluttered and started boiling. Did she lower her besan applied head in the frying-pan? I leave it to your imagination. Television is a freak medium. The rulers have a divine right to appear on television screen as frequently as they like it. Without realising what television can and can't do for them, they invariably intrude into the homes and hearths of the people, uninvited. The rulers think television is a magic. One of the self-appointed rulers of Pakistan, whose taking over the country was promptly legitimised under the law of necessity, was so excited by television that he instead of his office, wielded his wand of authority from the screen of television sets. Television is a medium for communication. It is not an end in itself. It merely provides extension to man. If you are a gentleman, a gentleman will be extended. If you are a villain, a villain will be extended. If you are an elegant person, you will be extended along with your elegance., If you are ugly, you will be extended along with your ugliness. If you are lying, a lie will be extended. If you are speaking the truth, truth will be extended. You can't toy with television. If television had potential to convert a usurper into a deliverer. General Zia-ul Haq would have easily outshone the Quide-e-Azam in the history of Pakistan. In his ruthless rule of 11 years General Zia-ul Haq abused and exploited television more than any ruler of Pakistan. Yet, he remains a dictator. Television did not come to his rescue. The courts in Pakistan are over-burdened with civil and criminal cases. Some of the cases are pending in the courts for decades. Therefore, in order to reduce the burden form the courts, some accused, at the behest of the rulers, are tried in television studios. Once I saw a set depicting gallows in one of the studios. The set designers were busy giving it finishing touches to look as real as possible. I enquired from the chief designer, "Are they up to hang someone in absentia?" "I think so," the chief designer replied. "Hassan Nasir?" "He was executed long ago." "But, Hassan Nasirs do not die." the producer of the programme chimed in. He said, "They live in every era with different names." I looked at the hangman's rope and asked, "Who do you intend to hang in the studios?"? With a meaningful smile on his face, he said, "The media." Courtesy: DAWN Magazine. |
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