"Why was she foolish enough to marry you?": In this new series, we ask couples how they met - and then the rest...

Dr. Joseph inveigles himself into Princess Margaret's heart

by Lakmal Welabada

Four out of six children and eight grand children of the Josephs have been rearing to go these past months - to get the couple primed for the celebration.

They are not in the position of coming back to Sri Lanka in the very near future. "Only two of our children are here with us while the others are in Australia and London with their families. But all of their souls are here...." says Dr. Joseph.

In 1956, the ravishing beauty, Miss. Isabel Therese Joseph was known as Princess Margaret by her relatives.

Nevertheless, Therese was an innocent, extremely down to earth and humble damsel who's life was partially dedicated to the All Saints' Church, Borella. Immanuel Lionel Joseph, a Western Medical Practitioner also happened to be residing at the Roman Catholic Hostel, just in front of the All Saints' Church.

He had hardly noticed the winsome young nubile girl.. Therese had seen him every now and then in the vicinity, and felt quite casual about it. That's until she had a pleasant surprise, seeing him beside the bed of her aunt Mercy at the General Hospital.

The introduction

Therese was not aware that aunt Mercy had deliberately summoned Joseph to the hospital to introduce him to her! Joseph was the House Medical Officer there, at that time.

"My mother, aunty Mercy and Joseph's family were related, but I had not met Joseph. I had three sisters and a brother and I was the third.

My father was dead by then, and my mother had asked aunty Mercy to find a suitor for me. So, after a few days, one Wednesday, I met aunt Mercy at the Church. Joseph's younger sister and her husband Prof. M. V. Devanandan were also with her. They spoke to me casually and I came home after the Mass.

And, after a couple of hours, all three visited our home. We were at Zaleski Place, Borella then. Along with the crowd, came Joseph. "came. I was in my Church dress and uncombed loose hair. I didn't know they were coming to propose to me," she says, with a cheeky blush yet visible despite her years.

"Oh, I told my sister and aunty I want to see her in the normal dress and not with make-up. But she still resembled Princess Margaret...." interrupts Joseph.

"I was 26 years and he was 31 years then. He was handsome and smart with nice hair," she continues.

"See, she has fallen in love with my hair only," Dr. Joseph butted in, with a giggle.

But the smiling Therese went on ignoring the aside "While the others were talking, he also exchanged a few words with me.

He asked me what my interests were. When I said 'music' he happily said it was his hobby as well, and asked me to sing a song right there. I was embarrassed as almost all the songs I liked were love songs. And I felt shy to sing such a song before the elders. Ours was a conservative society.

My Mummy and aunty also insisted on me singing.. With great difficulty I managed to gather my thoughts and recollected the words of 'Whenever a trouble comes your way....try to keep sweet'... Once I completed singing the song Jo altered it saying, 'whenever a trouble comes, you have to keep straight and not sweet.' She says this, and laughs almost hysterically.

..And so, handsome Jo expressed his desire to marry pretty Therese. Since Jo's sister and brother-in-law were planning to go to the States, the marriage had to go through soon.

Within two weeks after their first formal meeting at Therese's place, they got engaged on September 8 , which was also the 31st birthday of Jo. And a week after, they got married, on September 15.

Everything was done in haste. Therese was nervous. "Only Mother Mary could give me a solution," she thought.

The petition: A happy marriage

She wrote a petition and dropped it in the petition box in the Church. "Mother Mary, I want a happy marriage. But I don't know him very well. Dear Mother, help me.

I am leaving my marriage in your hands. Please let me have an honest, truthful and loving husband and good in-laws," she wrote. So then, she felt at ease and relaxed. Five to six families among their relatives got together and arranged everything for them. Main street, Pettah was the only shopping area in the town during that era.

On September 15, 1956, Therese dressed herself in a light gold Manipuri saree and covered herself in a veil. In contrast to the present trend, Therese did not hire any bridal dresser to do this. She did it all by herself with a little help from the others.

Jo waited for her at the All Saints Church, Borella in a smart black full suit and a blue tie. After the wedding Mass they hosted a reception at the Galle Face Hotel, Colombo.

"During that time there were only two hotels in Colombo; Galle Face and Grand Oriental Hotel. We had to spend about Rs. 8,000 for more than 500 guests who came. We actually have a faint memory of those numbers!" says Jo.

Sentiments

The couple took their wedding photo at Donalds, Maradana. After a honeymoon sojourn at Belihul Oya Rest the couple headed back for their home. The home-coming was at Jo's sister's place at Hilden Place, Mount Lavinia.

"Jo was from a very loving family. His father was dead by the time we got married. His mother and two sisters were very nice and treated me as if I was their own. I felt as though it was my own family," says Therese, and I could see the film of tears in her eyes. Jo was an old boy of St. Joseph's College, Colombo.

He was the middle-child, between the two sisters. Their medical practitioner father Dr. M. T. Joseph and housewife mother had always wanted the best education for their children.

Jo passed out from the University of Ceylon (University of Colombo now..) in 1957, and became a consultant, obtaining the Fellowship of the Royal College of Obstetrician and Gynaecology, and Fellowship of the Ceylon College of Gynaecology.

Dr. Joseph has added 28 letters beside his name by the time of his retirement, in 1985. "I still do spare time practices at Sulaiman Hospital," he says, reminiscing. "When I look back, I feel very happy about myself.

I have no sins on my hands, though I was rather a strict administrator to my staff. Being a gynaecologist I have never terminated a single criminal abortion, and never did a sterilization of tubes for the purpose of family planning, in my life. Instead, I have changed so many minds of those who have come for abortions. My mother was very religious and I was inspired by her," he says.

"I have had a very good, supportive, spiritual and devoted wife. All my six children are well educated, married(except the third) and doing very well," he says.

The Joseph couple had many things to share with me. Therese lit the lamp at the altar and stood right in the middle of their sitting room.

"God Bless You, Child!" they said, and continued to pray, as if prayer alone guaranteed those past fifty years of bliss...