'Unity in a marriage lies in the woman's hand ... '

Sachi talks of her life with Dr. Athugala, Chairman - SLRC:

Sunset and evening star
And one clear call for me
Let there be no mourning
In the bar
When I put out to sea....

Sachi still remembers the famous verse her father used to recite sitting beside her in the open garden on starry nights, which gives the connotation; `the sea (death) calls me to come to thee. So, when I go there (when I die), those who are on the shore should not mourn over me.'

Yo Me Haththecha Padecha
Kanna Nasancha Cheda Yee
Chiran Jeevathu So Raja
Nakuth Janthi Ma Disa.....

`Maha Raj' (Great King), let you amputate all my four limbs, ears and nose. But, I would never develop hatred towards you; instead would shower `Maithree' (compassionate kindness) upon you'....

Shanthi Thavusa (hermit - in one birth of Gauthama Bodhisathva before he became The Buddha) who was practising `Shanthi Paaramitha' (extreme loving kindness) uttered the above verse when the King of the country he lived ordered to amputate his limbs, ears and nose to verify whether he was telling the truth. Shanthi Thavusa never had anger or hatred whatever the heinous and monstrous onslaught he had to undergo. "My father used to recite these two verses constantly and practised it till he breathed his last. He was a good Buddhist. He gave that atmosphere to us since we were kids. Except Jaffna we were taken on pilgrimage to every nook and corner of Sri Lanka. My father was the idol in my life. I emulated what he practised. So, automatically, I too absorbed his beliefs and moulded my soul accordingly," she says. "Not only to be a devoted wife and a loving mother the belief has helped me, but also to lead a hatred free, virtuous and serene life. It's difficult and is it like swimming against the flowing waters of a river. But, conquering one's mind is the biggest triumph one could ever achieve in his or her life," explains the wife of Dr. Ariyaratne Athugala, Chairman of the Sri Lanka Rupavahini Corporation (SLRC).

Question: How do you apply your religious beliefs to lay life?

Sachi: I'm well organised. If one treads a good path, no evil can enter one's life. Thanks to my husband who never asks me what's happening to the monthly pay packet he hands over to me (laughs). He knows I won't waste a cent unnecessarily on clothes, cutex and lipsticks, but only on some charity work. That he silently approves. he's still a very quiet person who uses his words economically (laughs). I've never seen him in a peevish mood. Even if he gets irritated, the best way he shows it, is being in unbearable silence which is like a whiplash of a thousand words (laughs). He used to be a bit radical in his thoughts and fought against injustice. Once this quality of his made him to lose his job too. But, today I see a much different person in him (smiles).

Croupade Swetha Sachi Ratnakara was born on March 26 in 1962 as the youngest to one brother to a genius duo, Professor Thilak Ratnakara and Sriya Ratnakara. Her brother, Pragathi chose his career in Management in the private sector. Sachi, grew up in a well secured environment filled with love and compassion. Her mother's village, the beautiful Heerassagala, Kandy still remains in her memory lane as a mesmerising melody. And never did she miss a single school holiday to spend at her maternal `Maha Gedara'. L.B. Jayasena, her maternal grandpa who was one of the first Senate Members of Sri Lanka played a major role in moulding her character since her childhood. However the most effective influence was her father, Prof. Ratnakara. "He was not only my Pa, but my best companion with whom I could share any thought of mine. He used to recite his poetic thoughts; the prose and quotes he picked up from all kinds of subjects he read, especially of the world literature and economics in which he was excellently versed," says Sachi. "He was from Peradeniya Campus, and was the Professor and the Head of the Department of Economics at the University of Kelaniya. He became the Vice Chancellor of Kelaniya from late 1970s to 1982. Thaththa worked at the Lottery Board for sometime and was then appointed as the Economic Advisor to the Government of Seychelles until his death on December 1, 1990. It's a great loss!", she laments.

Shachi's Mum, Sriya Ratnakara as you all know was the first female Editor in the history of print media in Sri Lanka. "She was the Editor of `Vanitha Viththi', Sinhala women's magazine of the Times publishing group for five years since 1958, and then of the `Shree' monthly magazine of the `Davasa' newspaper group from 1963 to 1990. "`It seemed that you are married to the paper', I still remember how Thaththa used to joke about Amma's extreme devotion towards her work. But we were not neglected, and had the most beautiful childhood, a child could ever expect," she reminisces.

Sachi was a bright student at Visakha Vidyalaya, Colombo who spent her time either at the dancing room, Hewisi (Eastern) Band, choir or sports ground playing tennis or practising for track relay. "She is never at the classroom," was the constant complaint heard by her mother at the Parents-Teacher Meeting. Sachi learnt dancing under Vajira-Chitrasena since she was 7 years, and even did the main role in their ballet `Nirasha'. Today's veterans Ravibandu, Samanthi and Channa Wijewardane were her counterparts.

Prof. Ratnakara who was an art enthusiast urged her beautiful daughter to shine in dancing qualifying herself in all dancing forms as much as she could. As a result she ended holding two `Arangethrams' in Bharatha Dancing under Padmini Dahanaike and then in `Kuchchipudi'

(a rhythmic Indian dancing form) under Ranga Vivekanandan. Sachi was honoured to be the first student of veteran Padmini Dahanaike to hold an `Arangethram', and also was the first Sinhala student of celebrity Ranga Vivekanandan to hold the same event. She even performed at many events at the Indian Cultural Centre. "Thaththa's dream was to send me to India to do higher levels in `Kuchchipudi'. But then during that time, the LTTE problem rose and he didn't want to send me there," she recalls.

As many parents' wish, Mrs.Sriya Ratnakara's intention was also to see her daughter study to be a doctor. Hence, to fulfil her mother's desire, Sachi chose Bio-science for her A/Ls. Her dislike against the subjects was reflects in the result sheet.

This provoked her to take her destiny into her own hands and she got through with flying colours after sitting for the A/Ls in a second shy in the arts stream covering the syllabus in 6 months.

Even at the Colombo University, she had little time to spend on the lectures, but a lot on all sorts of activities involved in the Campus Art Circle (`Vindana Kala Kendraya'). However, she passed out with an Econ-Special Degree.

Question: When did Athugala enter your life?

Sachi: I was in the A/Ls then. My father was the Vice Chancellor at the Kelaniya University. The stage drama he directed with his campus students was a success. I used to go there too and watch the rehearsals. Athugala was one of the cast. He was a friendly guy and pleasant, but looked a bit shy, and rarely joined in with the conversation. It might be due to the fact that I was the daughter of the Vice Chancellor. Amongst the talkative lot, I noticed his silence, but did not pay much attention to it until he paid a visit to see me when I entered the Colombo Campus.

Question: He must have hurried up before someone else tried to get at you?

Sachi: Must be! (laughs)

Ariyaratne Athugala was born on October 22 in 1955 to the Athugala family at Munamale, Bamunakotuwa in Kurunegala District, as the fifth of eight siblings. After having his school education at Munamale Vidyalaya and then at Bamunakotuwa Maha Vidyalaya, Athugala entered the University of Kelaniya. One of his school Masters who recognised Athugala's unusual talent in writing ever since he was a kid, predicted that one day he would be a noble writer in this country.Athugala was a different child who showed some special qualities more than his siblings. "His mother says his was a pick and span character who wanted his room to be clean and dirt free throughout," butts in Sachi. Other than playing `Elle' from the time he came home from school until sunset, reading and writing were his pastime. He had a craze over the late famous singer H.R. Jothipala's songs and if a waft of Jothi's song was in the air from any corner of the house, that indicated young Athugala was around. When he became the Chairman of the SLRC two years ago, one of the first tasks he was involved in was arrange `Jothi Raathriya', a felicitation night to commemorate Jothipala.

"Our affair started when I was a first year student at the Colombo Campus. Ramani Kulasekara, a lecturer and my father's drama assistant at the Kelaniya Campus who instinctively felt that both Athugala and I had a silent attraction between us, arranged the match-making. We went on for six years until I got the consent from my family who were not happy over it at the beginning. We got married on February 21 in 1986," recalls Sachi.

After passing out from the university with a Special degree in Mass Communication, Athugala worked for the Youth Council at Maharagama for a brief period. The injustice he faced constantly at his working place made him bid farewell to the job, and decided to continue his higher studies in Mass Communication.

"By that time we were married. Since he didn't want to go back to his job I didn't force him to. Instead I started working as an Assistant Research Officer at the Family Planning Association for a brief period," she says.

Question: What happened then to all your talents?

Sachi: I've composed songs, even for films, and written many radio dramas along with my father. I had two dreams in life; firstly to go to India and learn dancing, and secondly to be a teacher in a remote village. Even at Visakha all my school friends were those who came from Grade Five Scholarship, studious and with radial thoughts. Though I was born and bred in Colombo, we were connected with the village a lot. Even Athugala came from a village.

Hence, I was so adamant to teach in a poverty stricken area to underprivileged children. But, since I was the only daughter, my father didn't want to send me to such an area. So, I had to give up.

After achieving his PhD Athugala went up in the ladder to be the Head of the Department of the Mass Communication and rendered a valuable service to exhilarate and popularise Mass Communication as a subject at the Kelaniya University. He has written more than 15 books on the subject. Apart from that he has directed four teledramas, `Sittara Gurunnanse', `Ramya Nagaraya', `Sooseta Mayam' and `Samanala Kandavura'. Dr. Ariyaratne Athugala was honoured for his Excellent Contribution to the Media Education in Sri Lanka once from the Hideo Snimizu (Japanese) Foundation, and then by the Mass Communication Association from the Prime Minister of Sri Lanka in 2006, and was given the Vayamba Puthra Prasadini Abhinandana Award at Kurunegala in 2004. He got the appointment as the Chairman of the SLRC in November, 2007.

Question: What are the other special qualities you see in your husband?

Sachi: He was a good photographer. When he was in the campus he even held a photographic exhibition titled `Sudu Saha Kalu' (Black and White). I still remember when he was to publish his first book `Sameepa Roopa', we didn't have money and I pawned my jewellery to fund it. We went through many hardships in life, but were very happy when we look back at it now. Thanks to my parents who have been with us throughout our journey in life. I render my fullest support to Athugala as a wife at all times in our life. He still doesn't know what he is to wear in the morning until his well ironed suit comes into his hands. He has no worries as everything is done for him (laughs). His is an extremely cool personality who takes life very easily. Though we were shaken up and agitated over the issues that took place at the SLRC recently, he was not. `Don't worry, everything will be alright', was his answer.

Question: Your message to the society and your future intentions?

Sachi: We have two sons. Renusha Mandara Vishruka is 19 years now, and his goal is to be an IT specialist. Yashasvi Abhimanyu is still 14 years. He is good at sports and is a bilingual writer. Both are Royalists. To see a successful future for our children is one of my dreams like every parent in this world. My message to the younger generation is do not discard our culture, customs and rites. Unity in a marriage lies in the woman's hand. Whatever happens, treat your husband to the best of your ability. I have little yearning for worldly desires.

I have been a complete vegetarian for the past 15 years. Engaging in Buddhist charity work has been my pastime in life. I've told my sons that once they are settled and there's a time I have to live alone, I will renounce the world and go for the yellow robes (smiles contently).