Dear Erica
Dear Erica,
 I
am a 13 year-old girl. I’ve got 3 male cousins from my Dad’s side,
who are 21, 14 and 11 years. I really love them a lot and care for them
but they just ignore me. They are very friendly with one other but
whenever I try to join, they shun me away. I want to join them but I
know it’s useless because they hate me. I used to be best friends with
my youngest cousin a few years ago but he started ignoring me after he
started associating with the other two. Could you please advise me what
to do? I do love them a lot and hope there could be some way to be
friends with them.
- Rejected
Dear Rejected,
I assume that you’re the only child in your family and need to have
some sibling connection with your cousins. It’s true that we wish that
they’d be there for us and that we can share everything with them
especially as they are your family. Of course, these are important for
family memories too.
Maybe sometimes on their part they must be going through the same
thing not knowing or how to get you into their little world of fun. Just
because they leave you out of their fun doesn’t mean that they hate you.
Or maybe because they grew up together and had their own boy times
together would make you feel a bit awkward to have a girl in their gang.
On the other hand, I hope you have friends that you can spend time with.
I feel you should go out and make friends and spend some good times with
a couple of good friends rather than feeling rejected and lonely at
home. As for your cousins, you need to give them some time and space,
things will turn out well. So stop worrying!
Dearest Erica,
I am a 23 year-old girl, I have being proposed to a guy at the
beginning of this year and everything worked out well for us. Since it
was a proposal, our respective parents are quite happy with us being
together too. The guy is very nice, humble and full of life. Our
relationship has now progressed for a few years as well. Dates have been
fixed for our wedding and it gives us great pleasure to do these
activities but also we are a bit stressful and nervous too.
Also lately, I feel that he has changed a bit but it’s not a massive
transformation. I have heard people saying that if you get all what you
want then there might be something wrong somewhere. Is that true? This
makes me scared and nervous. Sometimes, I tend to sit alone and think to
myself whether I took the right decision about my life. I’m also a bit
chubby.
Everybody used to say that I have got a beautiful face and need to
lose weight but no matter how much I try, I can’t lose it but I’m not
too over weight either. However, recently my partner started complaining
about my size in an innocent way and this has really worried me. Now I’m
having second thoughts about him too. Since then, I have stopped having
proper meals and don’t consume sweets. Please help me.
-Nervous
Dear Nervous,
 You both seemed to be going through pre-wedding jitters. This is very
normal for most couples who are preparing for the big day. You have had
a wonderful life so far and got what you wished for and I feel that
you’re living every girl’s dream right now and I believe that you have
every right to cherish what you have.
Stop worrying about what people say and stop worrying about how
chubby you look. During these times, you both will be a bit stressed out
and nervous so you need to adjust and be patient with each other as you
both are facing changes in your lives. Take things easy, talk to each
other about how you feel and get things out of your system. Clear away
your doubts and fears. I’m sure you will be a wonderful and happy
couple! All the best to you both!
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