Today is Mother's Day :

Mother's Day - A Buddhist view

by Rupa BANDUWARDENA

All will agree that there is one among the humanity much adored by everybody. She is none other than your mother. The world owes much to her. It is with her the world begins! She gave the universe the unity never known before. The world suvives with her. She is the finest in the world. Her mission was a great civilising factor in the world. She is the most noble being the world has yet produced unsurpassed by anyone.

Next to Buddha the Perfect One, here is a being who sacrifices her own comforts in the interests of her family. Just as Buddha, the world she is the guiding spirit to the family. The personality of the mother towers above all others. She has a wider appeal, in that she has developed a strong element in human society.

Important concept of Buddhism

The mother occupied a unique place in Buddhism. Siddhartha Gautuma, the all-wise, all-compassionate world teacher, throughout his life and in many of his previous births (Bosath) created an important place for women in society - specially the mother. Many of the Jataka stories are a unique reflection of religious the tradition depicting the pride of place given to the mother. All human emotions love, sorrow joy are depicted in the best form in discourses on mother. The stories of mother portray no ill-will, anger or disgust. Instead they reflect strong feelings of love and compassion. Each presents a narration on good qualities, virtue and moral values. Life stories of one's mother were focused as examples of good behaviours. Matu Posaka Jathaka is the best example.

It relates how Bosat kept his mother on his back and swam across the mighty ocean getting her blessings for future Buddhahood. Another best known story among the Buddhists is the Vessantara Jatakaya in which the life of Mandri Jevi, the mother of Jaliya and Krishnajina is an outstanding example for helping Bosat to fulfil his Dana Paramita. Amazing stories such as the Thiththira Jatakaya taught them how the elders should be treated and revered with due care and respect.

The great Master throughout his teachings placed the mother in very high esteem in the Suttas too. "He who being rich does not support his mother or father in their old age" is one of the twelve causes of loss to the losing man in this world. The Buddha has enumerated so, in the Parabawa sutta.

According to Singalowada Sutta, the Buddha taught a young man how to adjust himself to his parent's wife, friends and Master. In the Karaneeya Metta Sutta the stanza "Mata Yatha Niyamputtam .....states that a mother safeguards her only child sacrificing her own life with unlimited kindness towards all beings. Buddha said the mother is the friend at home. i.e. is Mata "Mittam Sakhe Ghase". According to Mangala Sutta, supporting one's parents, "Mata Pitu Upattanam" is the highest blessing that one can achieve.

Buddhist Legend and tradition

Buddhism deals with the facts of life. Mother has been the topic of discussion in the Buddhist legend and tradition. Here the mother's love is confined not only to her own children but to the others as well which is evident from the infancy of Prince Siddhartha. Seven days after his birth when Queen Mahamaya passed away, it was Maha Prajapathi Gotami who looked after the babe giving preference to him over her two children. This Buddhist tradition is well depicted. At the request of his foster mother Maha Prajapathi Gothami the Buddha established the Bhikkuni Sasana much later where she attained Arahantship and passed away at the age of 120.

In his attempt to find the gem of truth as an ascetic Prince Siddhartha underwent and suffering for six long years (Dushkarakkriya). He was reduced to skin and bone! Queen mother, Mahamaya who was in heaven Thavuthisa as Mathru Divya Raja' descended on the earth to support him in his noble quest to relieve universal suffering.

After the supreme Enlightenment, the Buddha visited Thavathimsa to preach Abhidamma to Marthru in heaven to show his gratitude. Another important instance, to note is the attainment of Sovan by Rupasara Matha the mother of Ven. Sariputta the chief disciple of the Buddha. Foreseeing the good fate of the mother who was at the time a non-Buddhist and learning that his lifespan will be over. Ven.Sariputta sought the permission of the Buddha to visit his mother and put her on the correct path which he did, before his Parinibbana.

Buddhist notion

In Buddhist society the mother is admired as the Buddha at home, Gedara Budun Amma There is a natural flow of metta' from the mother when she dedicates herself to the well-being and happiness of her children with no envy or jealousy whatsoever. Her love is reflected in her when children are in distress.

It is the mother who makes the child creative, innovative and enterprising with emphasis on discipline in his or her formative years. Hence the mother is there throughout one's life even after her demise. In the Buddhist world everyday is a Mother's day. It is equally important for children to look after their ageing parents when they truly need their love and support. Taking care of their parents should be their bounden duty.

I take this opportunity of bestowing merit acquired by producing this article (Dhamma Dana) on my precious mother who passed away two years ago after completing 100 years.

My mother, Lizzy Jaywardena, aged gracefully, reached her 100 years leading a peaceful life in retirement. A teacher by profession, my mother belonged to the older generation, genuinely interested in the welfare of her students. She served in a number of schools in Matara and Dehiwela. She was in good health until old age fell upon her. We are certainly a very proud family brought up by my mother after the demise of my father. Both should be held in high esteem.

She always advocated a life of Buddhist principles with a Buddhist background. She had accomplished many things within her span of life. Her life was a work of commitment and dedication towards our family, friends and relations.

May my parents and all beings be well and happy in their journey of Sansara until they finally attain the supreme Bliss of Nibbana!