Think awhile
by Amal Hewavissenti
Man is a gregarious animal so no man is an island unto himself.
Simply this is to illustrate that every bond in society is governed by a
network of relationships. One’s action is sure to bring about positive
or negative results on the other. In any case, understanding the nature
of others is really the first step to understand ourselves. At the same
time, it is completely pointless to make an effort to understand
ourselves without properly understanding others in relation to us.
 Selfish motives in a person makes him believe that his is a life that
is totally independent of all others and none can have control over his
life. Everybody in society is dependent on the other.
Each of us is a single whole in the large complex network of the
society. The boss of your office can drive your life into a state of
confusion or disorder forever or the one you love most can wreak havoc
on you. Even your closest friend can reduce you into an abject condition
while the conductor in the bus can be influential over you in a certain
way as long as you are in the bus! This shows that our life and moods
are prone to be manipulated to some extent, by the activities and moods
of those around us.
Therefore, nobody can ‘break free’ from his social net and brag of
his life as independent of the other members of the social circle where
he lives.
Live reality
This is not to say that we must live with and understand everybody in
every nook and corner but that we must live sensibly with the limited
number of people that we always move in. Therefore, we must have the
mental strength to see through the nature of people when we work with
them, associate with them, live with them or love them. You must have a
sound judgement to read the moods of those around you.
It is most important to remember that you should not be an open
mirror for everybody. If they penetrate into what you are, even the best
and most principled man would be ‘in’ for exploiting you. However weak
you may be physically and mentally, never let others know it or never
let it interfere with your dealings with others. If a person behaves
absent-mindedly in society, the inevitable repercussion will be others’
unnecessary encroachment on his personal life. So, pretend to walk
steadily with better eye sight though you are blind - pretend to hear
though you are deaf - or try to walk steadily though you yourself know
that you are physically disabled.
 This does not, at all mean that a person should view everyone or
everything around him with unnecessary suspicion. But he should be very
careful in associating with certain men who might be having ‘poison’ in
them - a poison greater in virulence man that of four or five venomous
snakes.
Subject of scorn
If you ever happen to sense, even slightly, that you are becoming a
centre of scorn by those around you, simply be ready to tactfully remove
yourself from their company. So long as you remain strong both in mind
and character, people, who are poised to profit by your weaknesses, are
forthwith defeated.
However influential those characters maybe, it is advisable to avoid
their company because you yourself do not like to feel your soul and
self-respect being crushed down by them. Perhaps we can never go on the
journey of life with people we can never understand. However, the
cardinal purpose of understanding people is leading our life without
unnecessary extra troubles, and situations which hamper our progress. If
you ever ‘pant’ in the middle of life, it reflects badly on your future
stability. In the same way, nobody has a right to fatigue you in life.
Therefore, sacrifice a precious minute of your life to understand
people. It is not at all a waste of time.
Finally, we must prepare ourselves to mingle successfully with people
around us without being trapped in anyway because we know how afflicting
the one hour’s isolation can be.
It is because our life is a complex organisation of both good and bad
experiences that are necessary for us to be superb analysts of life.
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