Dear Erica
Dear Erica,
 I'm an 18-year-old boy in a relationship with a girl who's eight
years older than I. She is the person whom I trust, love and care about.
It's been exactly one year since we've been going out but during the
past few months we have been fighting. She says she that I'm similar to
this guy she knows as he is like me in the way he talks and listens.
So I was hurt because I never looked or thought of having another
girl in my life other than her. Recently I caught her calling him and
later got to know that he had met her. I got so hurt and we had a huge
fight but I forgave her and have been trying to act as if everything was
okay.
But I think she is constantly cheating behind my back and I don't
feel the same way I used to feel for her. I think all the fun and good
times what we had are worthless. I want to move away from her but I fear
hurting her and at one point, she even told me to move on. Please
advise.
- Heartbroken
Dear Heartbroken,
In a relationship such as yours where you find yourself just
finishing school while your girlfriend is an adult who has established
herself and ready for a more mature relationship, things could get a bit
undulating as time progresses. For you, she must have sometimes been a
motherly figure, a confident and mature woman. For her, you must have
been all fun and boyish. But what you should understand is that as time
progresses, each individual's needs in a relationship can change. Your
girlfriend is of a marriageable age where she could be thinking of a
more steady future, mature commitment or even marriage.
This she may not find in you since you're still stepping into your
future. I believe that you should stop acting and convincing yourself
that things will smoothen out over time. She herself has expressed her
will for you to move on in life so you need not think that you will hurt
her by doing so. No matter how hard it seems, in this case I think you
better move on and concentrate on your other priorities in life.
There's a saying that 'if you love someone you've got to set them
free', and in this case I believe it will be a good option for you. Who
knows maybe you both will eventually find yourselves with each other
overtime or else there are other beautiful things in store for you in
life?
Good luck!
Erica's Poll:
Erica's Poll (please email [email protected]):
If you found out that you had one month to
live, what would you do?
- Spend time with family, friends and loved ones
- Enjoy every moment and accept death as we all are going to die anyway
- Ask God to give you a chance to live longer
- Cannot deal with it and end up being in a pool of happy and sad
moments
Erica's Quote of the Week:
"Every human being has inside them something
more important than him or herself - his or her gift"
- Paulo Coelho |
