Dear Erica
Dear Erica,
I’m a 17-year-old guy good in
sports and I have a reputation for being extra competitive which is not
bad until my anger adds into it. I just got into a relationship with a
wonderful girl and we both love each other very much. She’s caring,
sweet, really good in her studies and multi-talented. I’m the kind who
is average in studies and I sometimes feel that this could ruin things
for both of us. With my normal competitive attitude, I’ve been trying
very hard to keep up to her standards.
 I tried talking to her about this problem and she’s willing to help
me with it. But when I do have a problem, I don’t ask her thinking that
it’ll make me look weak in her eyes although she says a thing like that
can never come between us. Recently I’ve also noticed an improvement in
my work as I am committed to my job but I still have a long way to go.
Should I keep up with what I’m doing right now or should I try to make
up my mind and ask for her help? What sort of an impact do you think
this will have on our relationship?
- Competitive
Dear Competitive,
Every individual is born with different talents. Some are naturally
gifted with many skills and competencies while some work hard to acquire
these. However, we are all special in our own ways. It’s very natural
that you would feel a bit uneasy with your girlfriend’s standards. But
one thing you have to understand is that your talents are different to
that of hers. You may excel in one field while she may excel in another.
The main thing is to accept and appreciate each other’s talents.
Don’t ever make this a barrier in your relationship or turn it into some
kind of wild game where you want to prove yourself to your girlfriend.
With your competitive nature you have found yourself improving alongside
your girlfriend and I believe that you should keep doing so without
making it an issue for argument or egoism. I think it would be a
wonderful task if you could take some time in helping out each other in
developing yourselves.
In this case, I would suggest that you should take it as teamwork or
maybe do it with a mix of fun and friendly competition. Remember not to
ever take anything as an offence but a lesson. If you still find it
difficult for you to go to your girlfriend for help I suggest that you
set up little personal goals for yourself and start achieving them one
by one. All it takes is your love and motivation to make yourself a more
suitable partner for your girlfriend in every way. Accept each other and
love will conquer all!
All the best!
Erica’s Quote of the Week:
“Getting angry doesn’t solve anything”
- Grace Kelly |
