Quit your comfort zones

Comfort zones are areas where you feel secure, unchallenged and comfortable. Most of us do not attempt to do anything new because we do not want to make mistakes and become the laughing stock of others. Among most of our feelings, fear of failure is perhaps the most common self-defeating situation in life. Fear of failure is worse than any phobias that act as a barrier to progress.

Fear of failure is the end product of your actions. For example, a student of average intelligence should be able to complete a course of studies without much difficulty. However, if he is gripped by the fear of failure in examinations, he is unlikely to succeed. Such people are not self-starters who need very little guidance to develop their skills. Those who suffer from fear of success will find it difficult to push themselves forward to achieve their goals.

Fear of failure is closely related to the fear of criticism. If anybody wants to be a writer, they have to write following the age-old trial and error method. By following a manual of instructions nobody can become a writer. However, the trouble starts when you begin to write. The budding writer will soon realise that the world is full of critics. They will not hesitate to kill his enthusiasm by making negative remarks on his style, diction and content. Only a person with enough guts will be able to withstand such criticism.

Fear of rejection is also connected with the fear of failure. There are many potential writers who wish to become journalists and authors. Your first few stories sent to a newspaper are bound to be rejected. There was a practice in the past to return rejected stories to the writer with a printed rejection slip. I have collected a number of rejection slips sent to me by the now defunct Sun newspaper and the Daily News as well. The practice has fallen into disuse probably because modern newspaper editors are too busy to return rejected copies.

Those who suffer from fear of failure find it difficult to act like winners. A colleague of mine who completed his law degree and the Attorney's Finals creditably did not want to be a practising lawyer. Once he said, "With all my qualifications I will end up as a briefless barrister!" With all his achievements in law examinations he remained a teacher until retirement. It is surprising that brilliant people who gain qualifications to become professionals do not wish to leave their comfort zones.

Fear of failure is worse than any phobia

Those who are unsuccessful in life should blame themselves for not being motivated to work hard to avoid failure. While doing so they should also make an attempt to achieve success. You can avoid failure by not doing anything worthwhile. Those who succeed in life confront failure at every corner. But they are not easily discouraged. They work hard towards their goal until they succeed. Those who wish to remain in their comfort zones need not struggle hard to achieve success in life because they are not ready to enjoy it.

Fear of failure starts during childhood. Children are keen observers. They see how adults behave and decide to remain in their comfort zones rather than attempting anything new. Not only adult behaviour but also telefilms, and certain books influence their thinking in a negative way. When children become adults they naturally become prisoners of their comfort zones.

If you have an iota of intelligence, you will realise that fear of failure is something that does not stand to reason. It is not clear why people allow themselves to be so unrealistic to wallow in failure. One reason adduced by psychologists is that negative emotions like failure get embedded in your subconscious and never leave it.

Some of us do not like people who pinpoint our mistakes. Those who wish to succeed in life should treat them like friends and not as enemies.

All our failures teach us a lesson. Therefore, there is no need to fear failures because they are blessings in disguise. Those who never start doing anything new will never taste failure. If you can go forward overcoming failure, you are on your path to success.

Psychology offers you certain methods to leave your comfort zones. The first step is for you to learn from your mistakes. Instead of brooding over them, you can use mistakes as stepping stones to success. You can also learn from your own experience. Every mistake you make is part of your experience. When you do this you understand what failure is.

If you can do things that you are scared of doing, you are taking the first step towards success. Only a courageous person can face life's innumerable problems.

Those who wish to quit their comfort zones will find inspiration in Joseph Marshall Wade's illuminating words: "If I wanted to become a failure I would seek advice from men who have never succeeded. If I wanted to succeed in all things, I would look around me for those who are succeeding, and do as they have done."