The boss of former peers

The world has changed dramatically. The era of 'the boss' being older, grey haired and heavier than you is gone. Look around, you have different real life examples now. You often see peers who are younger with lesser experience numerically overtaking the older with longer years of service. You can be the next boss - if you are a boss already you may soon get the next level promotion. So be prepared to deal with the challenge of managing your new team.

Becoming the boss is an exciting transition, but it can also be a nerve-wracking one. This is specially true if you are now managing people who used to be your peers.

You need to establish your credibility and authority. It combines the challenges of any promotion with the additional challenge of people having to recalibrate their relationship with you.

The news of your promotion is likely to divide employees into two camps. One camp will be uncomfortable at the thought of being managed by someone who's essentially the same age as them - or even younger.

On the flip side, because you are 'peers', it might be easier to challenge bosses who are your age. This is what the old-school thinkers will fear, whether they are in charge or taking orders.

Tread lightly at first

You probably have tons of ideas about how to lead the new team. But don't introduce any major overhauls right away unless it's dictated by the hierarchy and understood by the team. You need to demonstrate your new authority without stepping on toes or damaging relationships. You would not like to come in as a weak leader, nor would you like to act like a super-peer either.

Identify a few small decisions you can make fairly quickly, but defer bigger ones until you've been in the role longer and have time to gather input.

Demonstrating you're in charge doesn't mean making a show of your new-found authority.

Instead take action that establish your credibility and indicate how you will work as a boss. One of the best ways is to meet your team, as a group and individually, to talk about your vision.

Talk about your approach to leadership and how you plan to lead the group.

This should be consistent with how people have seen you lead in the past. If not former peers' response can be seriously negative which will not offer you the start you wish.

The dilemma is that you can no longer have close, personal friendships with your former peers.

You can't continue to have relationships in the way you did before. This is a loss for everybody but it's part of the deal. If you do, you may appear to be playing favorites. Instead, you need to remove yourself from borderless social interactions.

For example, when team members go out drinking, it may be better to stay behind. You don't need to become aloof and unavailable, but you may wish to attend fewer social gatherings. If you're not feeling a little lonely and left out, that can be a sign that you're not distancing yourself enough.

Dealing with the disappointed competitor

Because you need to determine new ways of interacting with your former peers, you need to try out a few things. Nobody is going to get it right the first time. By experimenting with different things, you can figure out what works and what doesn't.

If one of your peers was in competition for the job, you have an added layer of complexity to address.

They've suffered a loss and they're going to handle that in a typical way: they'll be disappointed.

In some cases, you might just need to let the person adjust to the new situation. But it's important to make it clear that you value him as an employee and that you plan to advocate for his development. You can say something like, I understand you're disappointed.

You're an important part of this team, and I'm going to make sure you have what you need to succeed.

Look beyond your team

Of course, there are some upsides to being the boss of former peers. You will know the politics of the organisation better than an outsider. And, you're more likely to find someone you trust to give you feedback, and pull you aside and tell you when you screw up.

Leverage those existing relationships to ask for honest input. During transition, it's easy to become overly focused on your former peers.

But don't forget to deal with your new peers and your new boss. There will be challenges there too and you need to be aware of the relationship reshaping that needs to happen.

Ask yourself how you can build credibility with new counterparts and connections with your new boss. Without teams there are no bosses - so you better keep rallying people around you as the number one priority.