A tribute to every mother

By Carol Aloysius

A few days ago, people across the world collectively paid homage to a woman who spent most of her married life nurturing, caring and supporting her children physically, mentally, and financially - even in the face of tremendous odds.

Mothers Day which falls today is one day of the year when mothers are able to bask in the love and respect due to them no matter what position they may hold in society or how educated they are.

The tradition of honouring mothers, is by no means a new phenomenon. Its history harks back to the dim past when the Greeks dedicated their annual spring festival of fertility to the maternal Goddess Rhea wife of Cronus and other of many more deities in Greek mythology.

Ancient Romans also dedicated the spring festival to the mother goddess Cybelle, while early Christians celebrated a Mothers Day of sorts during the festival on the fourth Sunday of Lent in honour of the Virgin Mary, the Mother of Christ. Later the holiday was expanded in England to include all mothers and called Mothering Sunday, where after a prayer service in church to honour the Virgin Mary, children brought gifts and flowers to pay tribute to their own mothers.

Even in ancient Ireland spring festivals often resonated with the same theme of honouring motherhood.

However it was not until the 20th century that Mother's Day as we now celebrate it was introduced with greeting cards, beautifully wrapped flowers, chocolates and other commercial trappings.

The idea of official celebration of Mothers Day in the US was first suggested by Julia Ward Howe in 1872 , an activist, writer and poet who shot to fame for her famous Civil rights song 'Battle Hymn of the Republic'. She suggested that June 2 be annually celebrated as Mothers Day and should be dedicated to peace. Anna Jarvis in the early 20th century endorsed this suggestion on behalf of her mother. The green light for an official celebration of Mothers Day was finally given by no less than the American President at the time, paving the way for modern day Mothers Day celebrations.

Today the festival of Mothers Day is celebrated across 46 countries (though on different dates) and is a hugely popular affair. Millions of people across the globe take the day as an opportunity to honour their mothers, thank them for their efforts in giving them life, raising them and being their constant support and well wishers. As in previous years, on Mothers Day this year too, many fortunate mothers were showered with gifts and flowers, and enjoyed special family meals with their families, taking a much deserved holiday from their daily chores. On the commercial side, card stores and gift shops were kept open till late night as their families scrambled to buy last minute gifts and cards for their mothers.

Different scenario

But for millions of less fortunate mothers it was a different scenario altogether.

Not for them the luxury of spending quality family time with their children and extended family members. Instead on Mothers Day, one half of the world's mothers in impoverished and drought stricken countries spent this special day dedicated to them, battling with cats, dogs, and cattle as they dug into trash cans and mounds of rubbish heaps in search of morsels of foods to feed their hungry children.

Their counterparts in drought stricken countries spent the night after night swatting flies that settled on the fevered foreheads of their children, as hundreds of young victims of cholera (now raging in Somalia and other African countries) lay on makeshift beds and on mats in overcrowded hospitals. In war torn Middle East, mothers searched among the debris of the war for newspapers, straw, wood, aluminium sheets and sacking to set up temporary shelters so they could protect their children from the scorching heat at day and bitter cold at night, praying that they would live to see another day.

The Lankan mother

Lankan mothers have not been spared either.

The ravages of the 30 year war against terrorism in Sri Lanka have left their mark on thousands of mothers, young and old, who have been made widows, and have lost their sons and daughters in the war. Female headed households have sprung up in their hundreds in the North and East, solely managed by widowed women, all of them mothers struggling to adjust themselves to their new role as breadwinners, in addition to housewives.

Recent socio demographic changes have further compounded the situation of our mothers. Forced out of their rightful homes for various reasons by their sons and daughters, an increasing number of mothers now live out their twilight years on the streets, begging for food, or else languishing in Elders Homes. The rare visit by their children is all they live for.

"The cards you see on my mantelpiece are from a Mothers Day of yesteryear," says Ida, a septuagenarian living in an Elders Home. "In that bygone era, I was loved and respected by my family. When my husband died and there was no room for me in the house once my children moved in, I was sent to this Home where I have been an inmate for the past eight years.

Today, there are no cards from any of my family, although I have three children", she laments. Her fate is shared by Asilin Nona, a mother of four unemployed sons. Asilin weeps as she recollects how her sons had driven her out of the house with her few belongings when her eyesight failed her.

"I saw them through school, looked after them during their illness, and now that I cannot see they drove me to the streets where I have to beg for a living".

Beyond

As I write this piece, millions of mothers also continue to be battered, beaten, humiliated and abused often by those who gave life to them, worldwide and in Sri Lanka. Added to these are the millions of mothers who die because of unsafe births.

According to UNICEF every year, half a million women die from problems linked to pregnancy and childbirth, leaving behind over a million children motherless.

So what do these tragic facts signify in the context of Mothers Day which we have just celebrated one may ask.

The answer is that the observance of Mothers Day should go beyond just one day's celebration. For women who have spent their entire married lives, some as teen mothers, looking after their children and husbands, despite heavy odds they may face, enduring violence and abuse being inflicted on them by the people closest to them, is this too much to ask in return?

As a reward for all they have done for us, we should thus celebrate Motherhood every day, every hour, every minute, giving them our love unconditionally. If we can achieve this goal, by the time Mothers Day dawns next year around, we will have come one step closer to the real meaning of Mother's Day when mothers everywhere can finally enjoy their motherhood to its fullest.