Being Nice ... is the best way to get ahead

by Siobhan Harmer

The best portion of a good man’s life – his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.
~William Wordsworth

Being Nice! What does it mean to be nice? The Oxford Dictionary defines ‘nice’ as the act of giving pleasure or satisfaction to others or as possessing qualities such as a good-nature and kindness.

As children we are often told that being nice will benefit us more than being naughty, and that it is the right thing to do. If we’re naughty or selfish then we aren’t rewarded with praise and so most us learn that being compassionate and considerate will get us further.

Research from the University of Buffalo has even suggested that we are born with the ability to experience and spread kindness is in our DNA. They found that many of us are born with specific receptors in our brains that react to oxytocin and vasopressin; two hormones closely associated with our ability to feel love and generosity.

Meanwhile, a 2005 study conducted by the Hebrew University in Israel found that acts of kindness are linked to a gene that released the feel-good neurotransmitter dopamine in our brains.

However, as we grow up and enter the adult world being nice begins to take on different connotations. Often, being nice is not seen as a personality trait required of a strong leader or a capable team member. We’ve all heard the phrase “nice guys finished last” and many of us are guilty of judging genuinely lovely people as a little soft, insecure and even naive.

But being nice does not mean being weak or a pushover, it does not mean avoiding confrontation or never voicing concerns.

Not only is being nice the right thing to do, it’s also the smart thing to do. By spreading kindness you are scientifically proven to have crucial qualities that others lack, thereby increasing your success throughout life. Here are a couple so you can use your nice nature to get ahead!

You’re happier and nicer to be around

Although it may support the idea that there is no such thing as a selfless good deed, spreading kindness will almost always make you happier. Professor Sonja Lyubovairsky of the University of California conducted a social experiment in which volunteers were asked to perform random acts of kindness over the space of 10 weeks.

The results showed that those who had performed a variety of tasks scored significantly higher on the happiness scales than those who shared less kindness. Professor Stephen Post, author of Why Good Things Happen To Good People, says: “a strong correlation exists between the wellbeing, happiness and health of people who are kind. It’s difficult to be angry, resentful, or fearful when one is showing unselfish love towards another person.”

This reaction is due to the chemical make-up of our brain that occurs whenever we do something nice. In a Psychology Today blog post, clinical psychologist Lara Honos-Webb, Ph.D. wrote: “when we help others and do kind acts, it causes our brain to release endorphins – the chemicals that give us feelings of fervour and high spirits – similar to a ‘runner’s high. Doing something nice for someone also gives the brain a serotonin boost, the chemical that gives us that feeling of satisfaction and well-being.”

Of course, there are few qualities that create a more pleasant working environment than happiness.

When you show sincere kindness to your fellow workers or your employees you are much more likable, whilst offering support, optimism and a sense of community to everyone around you.

Professor Dacher Keltner, of the University of California-Berkeley and co-director of the Greater Good Science Center, told ABC News: “People trust you more, they have better interactions with you, you even get paid better.”

Better mental and physical health

We all know that in order to be successful we must first be able to function, and nothing brings us down faster than being ill. Fortunately, kindness is perhaps the quickest way to promote good health.

In 1991, Allen Luks’ book The Healing Power Of Doing Good reported that nice people experience a physical sensation when being kind that left them warmer, energised, calm and with a greater sense of self-worth. Luks has since named this feeling the ‘Helpers’ High’. “Regular ‘helpers’ are 10 times more likely to be in good health than people who don’t volunteer,” he says. “There’s an actual biochemical explanation: volunteering reduces the body’s stress and also releases endorphins, the brain’s natural painkillers.”

As our brain releases these hormones we also relax our nervous and cardiovascular systems. When oxytocin is released it binds to the lining in our blood vessels and dilates our arteries, thereby reducing our blood pressure.

Studies have also shown that those of us who are more actively compassionate have a more energetic Vagus Nerve. The Vagus Nerve is the longest nerve in the body and plays a huge role in keeping our cardiovascular systems healthy.

Your business is more likely to succeed

Back in 2011, Forbes’ Natalie Peace studied the impact kindness would have on her small business and found incredibly uplifting results.

“A little while ago, I initiated a campaign called ‘22 Days of Kindness’ at the three Booster Juice businesses I owned then” she writes.

“I paid all 50 of my staff members to do shifts where their only duty was to perform random acts of kindness: giving flowers to strangers, washing windows for neighbouring businesses, and generally going out of their way to brighten someone’s day.”

By the end of the 22 days staff said they had loved the experience and that they felt good and filled with pride.

At work, Peace’s employees were much more motivated and productive, whilst they received a remarkable amount of the applications from the public.

(Siobhan Harmer is a video game, coffee and travel lover from England. Although she is the human equivalent of a sloth, Siobhan sometimes writes things, most of which you can find on her blog There You Are Sibby)