Happifying tips from: Calvin and Hobbes
by Henrik Edberg
“I think we dream so we don’t have to be apart so long. If we’re in
each other’s dreams, we can be together all the time.”
One of the things I really enjoyed when I was a kid were my monthly
trips to the local used books store, where I’d buy all kinds of things.
Among them were these odd and hilarious comics from all around the
world.
Calvin
and Hobbes was one of those comics. I didn’t always understand it.
Calvin and Hobbes had strange and serious thoughts mixed in with the
crazy and imaginative adventures of the small boy and his best friend.
I still return to their adventures from time to time.And the things I
didn’t quite understand back then make more sense today. So here are
some thought-provoking, witty and happifying tips from Calvin and
Hobbes.
Look around you and appreciate your life as it is right now
“We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t
take time to enjoy where we are.”
Take a few minutes to look at the next thing you need to do. A goal
or dream you are focused on.
But then switch your attention to what is now. And spend most of your
time in the present moment. Work and play there fully and not with your
thoughts elsewhere.
And sometimes just pause during your day and be still. Take those
pauses to appreciate the wonderful things around you:
-The people and the moments with them, the food and a roof over your
head during a rainy day.
-All the big but also small and good things you may sometimes take
for granted in your life.
Everyone has bad days
“Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won’t help.”
No matter what you do there will be bad days. Sometimes you can turn
them around by for example getting an energy kick and releasing some
stress through exercise.
And sometimes, when such a thing won’t work, you can’t do more than
accept that this is how things are right now.
And that can actually help.
Because:
* When you accept and you stop feeding the issues of that day with
more energy – the energy you use when you so intensely want to control
and fix the issues – I have found that many of the negative feelings and
thoughts in my mind tend to weaken, fall away and disappear. It becomes
easier to think more clearly again and you feel better.
* A bad day can be fuel for creativity and learning. A bad day when
things don’t go so well often wind up being one of my more creative days
in retrospect. I rethink things on such days. I learn from mistakes and
temporary failures. I get new ideas.
* It reminds you of how life actually is. You can also see such a day
as a reminder of how life will not always bend to your will and be
perfect. This is very helpful to reduce the stress and pressure you put
upon yourself and to live a happier life.
Take the time to do nothing much at all.
“There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
Life isn’t just what can be captured on a to-do list. It is not
achievement upon achievement.
To me life is also about spending some time with just lazying around
in pajama bottoms on the weekend.
It’s about time in the afternoons just watching the summer clouds go
by from my sun-chair. And about hanging out with family and friends and
sometimes doing nothing much at all.
Because there is much happiness and relaxation to find in doing the
nothing you want to do. And because you can in my experience often find
new ideas, directions and appreciation for your life when you take the
time for these things.
Open up and let a friend help
“Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.”
If you feel scared or worried about something then that thing tends
to become bigger and more frightening the longer you hold onto it alone
and in your mind.
So instead, let a friend help you.
Let what you are scared or worried about out. Talk to your friend
about the issue. Just being able to vent and to get someone else’s
perspective on things can make a world of difference. It can make you
see things in a less scary light.
And maybe the two of you can even find a first practical step you can
take to start resolving the situation.
Do what YOU want to do
“What fun is it being cool if you can’t wear a sombrero?”
It can be hard to do what you truly want to do. Or be who you want to
be. You may think: how will people react? What will they think or say?To
just fit in is most often – in the short run at least – easier. But the
cost can in the long run become a life where you are almost always
holding back. A life of sinking self-esteem.
Here are two tips that can help if that’s the case:
* Focus on the small action you CAN take. So maybe you cannot do what
you want all the time. There are consequences and responsibilities and
at least temporary limitations in a regular life. But do what you can
with what have right now. Take one small step outside of your comfort
zone towards what you want to do or be. Then another small one. And as
you move forward you’ll build your self-esteem and confidence in
yourself.
* Don’t focus too much on how people may react. My own experience is
that in most cases they will be somewhat or very supportive or pretty
indifferent. The truth is that the world does not revolve around me or
you. People rarely have very much time or energy to spare for thinking
much about what you do anyway. They’re too busy with their own lives and
challenges.
(The writer is a 34-year-old journalism major from Sweden, who has
dived into the topic of personal development, which has seen him
learning from his own experiments and experiences and figuring out how
to build a better life. This article is one of his building a better
life experience) |