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| Sunday, 22 June 2003 |
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Weddings Why white's not right and June's not in tune by KAREL ROBERTS RATNAWEERA The month of June is coming to an end and with it the glory of the so-called 'traditional' June bride. The June bride concept-if it can be called a concept-has nothing whatsoever to do with Sri Lanka and indeed with any Asian country where the religion adhered to by the majority of the people is indigenous to that country. Each country has its own socio/cultural practices and weddings, funerals and whatever are conducted according to its particular cultural mores. The whole idea of the 'traditional' June bride, one suspects took root here during the British period of our history-this writer for one has not heard of it being associated with the Portuguese and the Dutch who were here earlier. Summer in England is the traditional time for weddings; Shakespeare in one of his plays says that in Spring young men's thoughts turn to love, or some such words. The warming of the heart with the onset of Spring, after the bitter winter, is a prelude to the summer wedding. However, it is really in July-midsummer-that most of the weddings take place. The Royal weddings of Prince Charles, the Duke of York and their younger brother the Earl of Wessex all took place in July, as did earlier royal weddings of their extended families. The Queen herself, however, married in cold November which in certain Eastern cultures, including Sri Lanka, is considered to be a highly inauspicious month in which to tie the knot, presumably because the Christian All Souls' Day falls on November 1st. In fact, it is known here as the month of the dead. The queen's marriage has lasted for 56 happy years to date! Of course there must be the exceptions. The European cultural ethic of marrying in summer has everything to do with the warm weather that sets in during this particular season. Summer flowers are in full bloom (they differ from winter flowers), people have shaken off the chill of winter and are in the mood for celebration. In England whoever heard of cricket being played at any time but summer? The English settlers in the Ceylon of the 19th century would therefore have arranged their weddings for June and July-our summer as well (this island is seven degrees North of the Equator and is therefore in the Northern hemisphere), although the heat of June which we are going through now, and the even worse heat of July and August to come makes one wonder whether the British settlers wouldn't have preferred to have their weddings in Nuwara Eliya rather than in Colombo in the summer months! Be that as it may, the point I am really getting at is the practice-also based on Western Christian culture-of our brides wearing white which is a Buddhist mourning non-colour. In the Christian social concept, a bride wears white to show the wedding guests and the world that she is a virgin. The face veil worn by the bride when she walks down the aisle-or is it up?-or even on the poruwa (ceremonial, decorated podium on which the bridal couple are married), is also to signify that she is a virgin. However, English royal brides do not wear the face veil because there is no question that they are not virgins at the time of marrying. The queen did not wear a face veil at her wedding and the tradition was carried on by the other royal brides. But the Lady Diana Spencer wore a face veil at her wedding and this was commented on by the those covering the wedding. However, Diana was not a royal bride in the sense that she herself was not of 'the blood Royal', so one can conclude that she did the right thing. She became a 'royal bride' when she walked down the aisle with her new husband, the Prince of Wales. Indian and Pakistani brides wear the brightest colours in the spectrum, red being de rigeur, and one supposes other Asian and African brides who are not Christian also wear bright colours. So why do Sri Lankan brides wear white? One should imagine that it should be regarded as highly inauspicious for them to do so. In the case of Sri Lankan Christian brides, it is acceptable because they are following the Western Christian cultural pattern. All Sri Lankan Christian brides marry in church, and imagine a bride walking into the church clad in blood red! However, this writer remembers a former colleague, a beautiful bride indeed, who wore a white silk Indian sari bordered in red to match the bridegroom's ceremonial military attire which had touches of red on it. She also wore coloured flowers, including marigolds, which are favoured at Indian weddings, in her jet black, shoulder-length hair and carried a bouquet of coloured flowers. Her traditional white veil was of antique lace. It is, however,good to see that trends are changing for the better and several Sri Lankan brides are wearing colours such as gold, champagne, cream and even light pinks and related shades for their weddings, with coloured flowers in their hair and in their bouquets instead of the funereal white flowers. These new trends are even being adopted by some Christian brides marrying in church, and certainly by brides who wear the traditional Kandyan sari in which to stand on the poruwa. What should also be seriously considered is changing their wedding month from the sweltering summer of June to a cooler one. Here it has to be mentioned in all fairness that the cooler month of December is also a popular month for weddings. Why hang onto a cultural practice that has no connection whatsoever with our own culture? |
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