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| Sunday, 16 October 2005 |
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Features |  |
| News Business Features Editorial
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Driving in Sri Lanka : Heart rending, hilarious, exhilarating, always unforgettable by Lionel Wijesiri It has been said that many atheists have come to Sri Lanka. Returning back home after having been on our roads for few weeks, they have become firm believers of God. Does this mean that we are highly spiritual people or there is something spiritual in our driving styles? Highway Code
Most surviving drivers observe a secret Highway Code. There is no printed version. You learn only on hands-on experience. Like any other specialised craft, it could be learnt only by doing it. Of course, during the learning process, there are in-built occupation hazards, like minor and major accidents including death. Let me share with you a few tricks of the trade I have learned myself. Those might help you to keep surviving while driving. Once you get over the initial fear of death, driving in Sri Lanka is really quite amazing. To be precise, it is an art form and talent which could be possessed by a selected few. To be even more precise, it's better than any roller coaster ride in the States. Drive on the left or right of the road? The answer is "both". Basically you start on the left of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess. Driving techniques? Just trust your instincts, and aim your vehicle in the intended direction and press the acceleration to the bottom with both hands on horn. (Adherence to colonial road rules leads to much misery and occasional fatality). Don't stop at pedestrian crossings just because some fool wants to cross the road. You may do so only if you enjoy being bumped in the back. Pedestrians have been strictly instructed to cross only when traffic has come to a dead stop. Still some idiot may try to wade across, but then, let us not talk ill of the dead. Overtaking is mandatory. Every moving vehicle is required to overtake every other moving vehicle, irrespective of whether it has just overtaken you. Overtaking should only be undertaken in suitable conditions, such as in the face of oncoming traffic, on blind bends, at junctions and in the middle of town/city centres. No more than two inches should be allowed between your vehicle and the one you are passing and one inch in the case of bicycles or pedestrians. Blowing your horn is not a sign of protest as in some countries. We horn for many reasons (which are indigenous to Sri Lanka). Short blasts (urgent) indicate supremacy: (overtaking one to three vehicles moving in front, clearing three-wheelers and pedestrians from path) Long blasts (desperate) denote supplication: (To the oncoming car "I am going too fast to stop, so unless you slow down we shall both die"). In extreme cases this may be accompanied by flashing of headlights (frantic). Single blast: "I have seen someone out of our 19 million whom I managed to recognise", or "I have not blown my horn for several minutes." Special note In the case of buses, all horn signals have the same meaning: "I have an all-up weight of approximately 12.5 tons and have no intention of stopping, even if I could." This signal may be emphasised by the use of headlamps. Rights of way: Traffic entering a road from the left has priority. So has traffic from the right, and also traffic in the middle. Lane discipline: All traffic at all times and irrespective of direction of travel shall occupy whatever lanes they prefer. Its open market policy. Roundabouts: These are built to beautify the cities and have no traffic management function. Any other impression should be ignored. Night driving on Sri Lankan roads can be an exhilarating experience (for those with the mental make up of Genghis Khan or) in a way, it is like playing Russian roulette, because you do not know who amongst the drivers is loaded. What looks like premature dawn on the horizon turns out to be a container truck attempting a speed record. On encountering it, just pull partly into the field adjoining the road until the phenomenon passes. Do not blink your lights to buses expecting reciprocation. The only dim thing in the oncoming bus is the driver and the peg of illicit arrack he has had at the last stop; his total cerebral functions add up to little more than a naught. Remember - these bus drivers are the James Bonds of Sri Lanka and are licensed to kill. Often you may encounter a single powerful beam of light about six feet above the ground. This is not a super motorbike, but a bus approaching you with a single light on, usually the left one. It could be the right one, but never get too close to investigate. You may prove your point posthumously. Postscript: The moral of these findings is that the unpublished Sri Lankan road rules broadly operate within the spiritual domain of karma where you do your best and leave the results to your insurance company or, better still, your friendly undertaker. |
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| Produced by Lake House |
Driving on our roads is an almost hallucinatory potion of sound,
spectacle and experience. It is frequently heart-rending, sometimes
hilarious, mostly exhilarating but always unforgettable and, when you are on
the roads, extremely dangerous. 
