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| Sunday, 19 February 2006 |
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Short story : The lost heart The morning came without any warning, when my sisters surrounded me, and wrapped me in scarves..... The scarves seemed to suffocate me and I stared ahead at the blank wall. The view from the small window was beautiful and I tried to breathe in the fresh air Desire My sisters sat all around me, whispering all kinds of things to me with smiles on their faces.
"Why don't you try the red one?" I stared at my skin that looked so fresh and new. My mind filled with new fascinations and I had a sudden urge to throw away all the pretty scarves somewhere.....and run on the roads like an English woman, to row a boat like an English woman and to drive a car like an English woman.... Glamour "So, what do you think of this?", my eldest sister asked giving me a beautiful red garment. It had silver studs that sparkled like the moonlight on the water. "Mm....", I said, my eyes travelling along he glittering garment. The huge lamp shining with brilliant lights of glass above me seemed to touch my mind and I remembered how he spoke to me kindness and tenderness were in his eyes and I knew I would be happy with him. To be the head of household duties and to move around a house wearing glamorous garments like an angel was every woman's dream. I did not know what I wanted. Could I be one of those angels? Or did I want to be like one of those lively women who wanted to run, jump and walk alone on streets? Dazed I stood up and pushed one of my sisters away. I muttered something about going downstairs, and moved towards the door. My sisters children ran around and their husbands sat below. I turned around and headed towards the room with the computer. I love to stare at this wonderful machine that taught so much. Unfortunately my brother never taught me how to use it. I touched the smooth cool surface of the computer. My fingers ached to type on the key-board like other women did with so much rapidity and ease. My confused mind created a sudden realisation in me and I felt that the red scarf around my neck was not necessary and so I pulled it. The glitter spread on it and the shining redness at once projected an immense beauty that I was tempted to put it on again. Freedom I walked out into the verandah. We were generally forbidden to go into the garden and I noticed the tall trees and the flowers with a sense of sadness. Will I ever be able to run around that tree? Or to climb onto it. I looked around me and stepped onto the soft earth. No one was around and I furtively walked towards the tree. The morning seemed to enhance its beauty and I removed the scarf which was around my shoulders. The other scarves were waiting for me on my bed and I tried to forget them....., tried to forget the gold jewellery.....and the sparkling garments.....I hugged the tree in front of me. Its huge trunk seemed to protect me from others. Maybe I could hide here forever....I smelled the flowers and kissed them. I ran on the fresh grass. I suddenly had an urge to climb the huge wall surrounding our huge house, but then.....I heard someone calling my name and I stopped. My heart paused. I ran back to the veranda and walked quickly back to my room. My eldest sister stood in my room when I went in. "Where were you?" she asked "Don't you know that you are getting married tomorrow?" I murmured something to her though I don't remember what I said. Retreat I sat on my bed again and my sisters surrounded me once again pressing sarge after sarge on me and I covered my head once again, partly.... with a shawl. Theelin Thilakaratne, 2006 A/L, Musaeus College.
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