A cats diary The Daily Muse

Feb
15
I hear yesterday was an important day for the humans, something to do
with their mating rituals. They are strange creatures and instead of
kuppa-mania they have a thing called choklut. Which they produce and
give to their females along with flowering red plants and shiny stones.
This makes the females happy and of course the rest is anatomy. I
wonder what Patchy would think if I gave her a bit of choklut. I hear
that the choklut thing is not good for cats or for pooches.
 A
large choklut can kill a small dog, and another mistake hewmies keep
making is giving us paracetamol. This is dumb and someone should put an
end to it. At least the famous paracetamol company should put a small
cat skull and crossbones on their pill boxes and say THIS IS TOXIC TO
PETS
Memo to Self - somehow spread the word that paracetamol is poisonous
to cats.
Feb 17
I
understand that it is Patchy’s day for Wettinary attention. She doesn’t
like this and gets rather savage. If you put her in a basket she
*caterwauls, *there is no other word for it. Our hewmie madam put her in
a small school bag and left the zip open a few inches on both sides.
Then they drove her over to the Wettinary Clinic, keening miserably
and making everyone generally depressed. The hewmies are dumb but they
are also kind hearted subjects and want the best for us; they did a
thing called inoculation to her saying that she would be safe from mad
dog disease.
I don’t understand why cats would need to be safe from this but it’s
very serious I hear. It doesn’t actually hurt much, the inoculation
thing but the table is cold and the lights are really bright and hurt
your eyes and the Wet is a very mad man who you have to be careful of.
Patchy
tries to hang on the inside of the bag and not come out even when the
bag is turned upside down and shaken. I don’t know about you but I think
this old cougar is pretty darn lively for that age...I mean according to
cat years she is something like 65 and I’d like to see any hewmie female
of sixty five hanging on by their nails while being shaken about inside
a gunny bag.
No wonder the ancient Egyptians worshipped us, we cats are pretty
fantastic.
Memo to self: I hate the Wet. |