I never believed in love at
first sight. So I guess it was no surprise when I fell for him. I still
don’t know what exactly I fell for; he was anything but drop dead
gorgeous. He was so, what can I say, ordinary?
I was in my third year in the University of Kelaniya and had to do my
first semester assignments that required a lot of surfing. I was boarded
back then, in Borella so I thought an Internet cafe at the YMBA was the
best and cheapest.
Imagine a guy at an Internet cafe! My mom would have had a fit. But
as they say love is blind. He was wearing a cap and a long sleeved
t-shirt. That’s probably the most unfashionable attire for a guy.
Perhaps it was his nonchalant air that attracted me. Anyway I fell
head over heels in love with him. Not at first sight though. You can say
he grew on me. He sort of has that effect.My assignments showed no sings
of completion.
In fact my surfing sessions kept on getting longer and longer. He had
the best taste in everything but clothes. But later on I started to
think even that was cute. His taste in music was the most noticeable. He
liked the same singers as I did - Edward Jayakodi, T.M, Nanda Malini and
the like.
Since I was living off my parents I really didn’t want to spend so
much money on printouts. And he was kind enough to exploit all available
space in the A4 and charge me the lowest rate possible. He said he knew
how hard university life was.
It turned out that his brother was in his forth year in Kelaniya.
What a coincidence!We got closer and closer. It didn’t take us too long
to share our life stories. My life was pretty boring, at least compared
to him.
He used to be filthy rich, but lost all their money trying to save
their mother’s life, who ultimately gave in to cancer. I think I fell
more in love with him because of his life story.
I finally graduated and I had to leave my boarding place and my
communication with him was restricted to a few occasional e-mails. Many
interviews and tests later I landed my first job. But our correspondence
increased steadily.
He wanted to start a new business and I tried to get him a loan, but
miserably failed. We got so close during this time, that I was convinced
that it was more than just an infatuation.
One day when I asked him how he plans to find the money, he proudly
announced that he had already found it, that his fiance’s father had
loaned him the money. In all our conversations he had failed to mention
this. But I never believed that he evaded the subject on purpose. And I
was right, only later did I learn that it was a subsequent development.
Never have I cried as I cried on that day. I thought my life was
over. She had been in love with him for eight years! Who wouldn’t be, he
was an angel of a person. For him it had been a platonic relationship,
with her as well as me. That’s the way he felt about all girls ‘purely
platonic’. But I know that he didn’t do it for the money. He did it for
her. Eight years waiting for a guy who didn’t even know you loved him!
Even I can’t beat that. I had no remorse for letting him go. She
deserved him.
I do not wish to reveal any names. I just wanted to get this off my
chest. If he is reading this he would know that I’m over him now.
Tharushi
To
my love
I see your innocent smile - all day and night
I hear your soft voice - all day and night
I feel your warm sense - all day and night
I see your bright eyes which are the windows of my soul.
But your bright eyes gave me hope
Then you destroyed them, and cheated me
Didn’t you?
How can I ever forget you
As I have never been angry with you
I will always love you.
Poornima Kulasinghe
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