For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are those ‘it might
have been’
 Love is the essence of life. Yet
we find it difficult to find true love. There are many single men and
women out there, looking for the right match. Many divorced and
separated have no faith in love. But do not despair. Open your heart and
be willing to risk it. Break out of the impenetrable fortress that you
have built around yourself. Life is a good teacher.
Do you have great chemistry with your partner? When in love, you
experience a variety of emotions. At times, love makes your spirit soar
with happiness. At other times, falling in love can bring negative
emotions such as jealousy. Then there are times when love treats you
like a doormat. But that is the beauty of love. You have to live the
experience to know what love is.
What is love? A word that has no definition? Poets have glorified
love. Many battles have been waged for the sake of love. Yet, it remains
an enigma. If you have found true love, you would know that love is a
feeling like no other. It complements life and happiness. Love is the
pulse of life. The emotion that encapsulates all that is beautiful.
It is amazing how this single emotion has woven itself so intricately
into the fabric of our existence. Centuries ago, poets expressed their
eloquence through their interpretations of love.
Their words told us what love is. Centuries later, we still find
ourselves exploring the meaning of love. We all want to know what love
is.What is real love? And is there a difference between that and the
heart-pounding adrenaline rush you feel when you see…? You know the
person I’m talking about. That, hot guy playing basketball at the gym…
the cute girl who makes eye contact as she passes by…It’s that person
whose comments and actions we keep track of and analyze to no end, when
he or she is in the same room.
There are a few things love isn’t. Love isn’t just emotions. Although
real love is often accompanied by strong feelings, but love is not the
equivalent of the sort of scenario that movies, television, and songs
portray. A relationship wouldn’t last long on just emotions. In fact,
knowledge is the basis of a healthy relationship.
Knowing about the other person is the key. Knowing about the person’s
personality and character is so important. One good test is to list the
qualities that attract you to that person. If the list is long that
means we know a lot about them and are attracted to those qualities. If
the list is short, we either don’t know a lot about them or we know a
lot but aren’t attracted to his or her personality.
 Another important factor in a relationship is common life goals. If
the relationship is going to be long term, we need to be going in the
same general direction as the other person. If his dream is to travel as
an international businessman and she wants to be a realtor in a single
location, conflict could arise. If she wants to live in the countryside
with nature and he likes the hustle and bustle of a big city, there are
potentially serious problems with the direction they are going.
Love isn’t just sex. That statement alone goes against a lot of what
the entertainment industry feeds us. Whenever two people hook up in pop
culture, they have sex. Without showing some of the unpleasant realities
of premarital sex, it is portrayed as a wonderful, fun and recreational
activity.
Sex is created for marriage – a long-lasting commitment between
couples. Premarital sex can have harsh consequences. Unwanted
pregnancies, sexually transmitted diseases, guilt, insecurity, and shame
can follow. A relationship based on lust can only last as long as the
two are physically close and find each other sexually attractive.
Love is a choice. It’s a commitment. Although emotions will accompany
love, and although sex will be a part of marriage, a lasting, healthy
relationship cannot be based on just sex.
Do you ever wonder why we constantly seek love from others but never
feel completely satisfied? It’s because we have been designed for
unconditional love, and we, as people, are flawed. People, whether
friends, family or your significant other will invariably let you down
at some point. We should realize our need for love and accept it first.
One cannot meet all our needs, even if he’s funny or she’s thoughtful.
Can we begin to love others with the same quality of unconditional love
that we seek? The way to love anything is to realize that it may be
lost.
- Anuki
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