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| Sunday, 22 August 2004 |
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Susanthika heads for Bush campaign Light Refractions by Lucien Rajakarunanayake American elections generally have icons that are considered able to gather votes for the candidate who uses them. With this election being short of such icons, the Bush campaign team began to work fast on the possibilities of using Susanthika Jayasinghe aka Malalakeliya, in the campaign for George W Bush. Condoleeza Rice made the recommendation that they probe the possibilities of having the local Susy Malalakeliya, for the Bush campaign. Being coloured herself, Condoleeza had said the Bush campaign was short of support from women, especially coloured women, who can make a difference if they register to vote in large numbers, with the coloured vote generally going to the Democrats. "This woman might just be the figure we need to attract the votes of coloured women, she's coloured and has won a Bronze", she said. "What's so important about her, asked Bush O'nothing, one of the main campaign organisers. "She has only won a Bronze at the Sydney Olympics and Silver at World Championships earlier. Here in the United States we almost have a glut of Olympic Golds, with the increasing numbers we win at each games. Of course we may not do so well in gathering bullion this time because of the doping scandal. Yet, what how can this Sri Lankan Susy help us?" "Haven't you read what she said of the Prez" asked Condoleeza. "Very bad research. She refused to run for her country, although the captain of the national team, because of a supposed injury. After the Sri Lankan Prime Minister failed to convince her to participate, she said that not even if President Bush asks her would she run at Athens this time." "What's so big about that?" asked Georgie All-the-way, one of the few black activists in the Bush campaign. "Can't you see the importance she has given to the Prez? When he is being condemned by everyone in the rest of the world, and almost half of the United States, here is a woman who accepts his power and authority," said Condoleeza. "It think it will be a strategic gain to have her on our side. All we have to do is send her a ticket and get her down here for the campaign. I'm told that she loves such giveaways especially when it comes to travel abroad." "Hold on, I think we were being carried away by the comment of this Sri Lankan Susy whoever it is. "Don't you see that she has in fact belittled our George, who is fighting terror all over the world by saying she will not run even if he asks him to do so?" "You've lost the point. She has not belittled the Prez. She has accepted that he is the greatest, as Mohamed Ali said about himself. Read into her words, look at the deeper meaning. What she says is that the Prez is the greatest, but she would not even heed to a request by him because of her injury. I'm sure her injury won't bother her if invited to the US and asked to join in our campaign. She will love the fee and the many perks too, and won't have to run for any record or medal. She can tour most of the US, even speaking in her own language, and I am told there are many from her country and community in the US now. They may just give us the badly needed edge, of even a few hundred votes, over the Kerry campaign. "Are you sure she will come here and endorse our Georgie? Don't you think you should ask the Prez himself?" asked a more cautionary Geo Bandwagon, who was handling propaganda in the Bush Campaign.It was not difficult to get a time for a meeting with President Bush with him being more concerned about the November polls than even Iraq. When Condoleeza Rice outlined the proposal to get Susanthika Malalakeliya for his campaign, the Prez asked where his Bronze Star was from. "She's from Sri Lanka. It is a democracy, which too can come very useful." "Sri Lanka, Sri Lanka, the Prez was jogging his memory. Ah! Yes, that's the country infested with those tigers, isn't it? I think Collin and Armitage have listed them among terrorists, so how can we get anyone from there to campaign for us, when we are said to be fighting terror the world over?" "We've done our research Prez," said Condoleeza, who always gets his ear. "She is not from the Tiger side, she is from the other main community opposed to the Tigers. In fact we can get her to endorse the US role against international terrorism, by praising you for continuing to have the Tigers on the banned list." "Well, is the Prime Minister there still the same guy who bothered me through some of our Republicans just for a 15-minute photo op, some months ago?" "No, he has been defeated in democratic elections. But that is no problem. The new party in power is also thankful to us for banning those Tigers." "I can't forget that Prime Minister. He gave me a gift of embossed paper made of elephant dung, I had to wash the smell off my fingers." "We can turn that into a plus Prez" said Condoleeza. "How's that asked Bush? How, can some handmade paper from elephant dung help in our campaign?" "Look Prez, we are weak on the environment and ecology front. We can get down more of such paper for use in our campaign just to beat the hell out of Kerry on ecology and recycling." "Hmmm, not a bad idea. Get her down, as soon as the games are over in Athens, or even before that. Leak it to the Press that there will soon be a bronze star in our campaign, who can make the difference, among the coloured vote," said the President. "Just one point Mr. Prez," said Geo Bandwagon, much to the annoyance of Condoleeza who was happy with the President's endorsement of her suggestion. "What is it?" asked Bush. "My research says there is a larger from the community from which those Tigers spring out, than her community, living in the United States. Won't we be antagonising them? Also, they have plenty of money to spend. What if they buy her up after she comes here? I'm told she always goes for the biggest bidder." "Has anyone in this Tiger breeding community done or said anything in support of my campaign. I don't believe so. Anyway, I don't think any such community will be able to outbid us for this Susy somebody, with the cash we have in our war chest, Ask her bring that Bronze with her. Try and work out a Bronze campaign to attract those coloured women, " Bush said with a note of finality. Condoleeza could hardly hide her pleasure. Back in little Sri Lanka there was much criticism of Susanthi Malalakeliya, and of those who sent her to Athens, appointing her as a non-participating captain. Jayalath Malalasoori, a well known figure in the local athletics scene, asked whether our Minister of Sports was more powerful than President Bush, for Susanthika to be unable to refuse his request that she go to Athens, apparently much against her wish and knowing very well that she will not be participating. Many thousands of Sri Lankans were critical of getting such a person to carry the national flag in Athens. Who cares? Her bags are now being packed to proceed to the US. The Bush campaign has been placed for handmade paper from Sri Lanka made from elephant dung. |
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