Darling we aren't too old though we pass the Jubilee Gold:

Still hopelessly devoted to carefree teen bride

by Lakmal Welabada

Upasena got off his Vespa scooter. The sea breeze of Pallimulla was fresh. He breathed it in until he filled his lungs. Dannie, his friend, the pillion rider got off the scooter.

After a journey from Colombo that took for a few hours on the scooter, both of them were exhausted. "Dannie Aiya would you like to drink a 'Vaveraya' (coconut water)?" Upasena looked behind when he heard a girl's voice. A school girl in her uniform was beside them grinning at them. "Ah, Rupa Nangi, how are you?" asked Dannie. "Ok, Aiya, we are fine," she replied.

Upasena was stunned. But the next minute he gathered his senses. He watched Rupa running like a butterfly swinging her tie and loose belt like her two wings. A slight smile appeared on his lips. He was taking- a liking towards her. The mischievous damsel was still a 15-year-old.

The next moment Rupa appeared with two cut coconuts for them to drink. She gave one to Dannie who almost grabbed it as he was feeling thirsty like a fish. When she stretched the other to Upasena, he paused a while without at once taking it to his hand.

Rupa gave him a hearty smile, innocently but still with a mischievous charm. She was still a child. But, Upasena felt as if his heart stopped. He smiled back. Rupa who had been extravagantly easy going with her friendly attractive behaviour felt strange.

Dannie Aiya's friend's smile was different. She felt it, but didn't waste time to think about it as she was planning to go to the sea the next minute with her younger sister.

Dannie was working for Rupa's father, A.B.charles de Silva owner of Silva Boot Works at No.71, Prince Street, Pettah. Silva Mudalali used to send money to his family at Matara through Dannie, and it had become part of his job.

And that day he accompanied Upasena, who readily agreed to come with him as he thought he could also see his relatives in Galle on the journey via to Matara. Upasena was happy to visit his relatives after a long time. And seeing Rupa was an unexpected thing that occurred. He never thought he would get so enticed by a teenage damsel.

After having the evening tea Dannie got ready to set off. It was Rupa's aunt's (mother's sister's) place. Rupa's home situated at Polhena. Dannie and Upasena first went there, and then proceeded to Pallimulla to Rupa's aunt's home knowing that they had gone there.

"So it's still memorable. Even when I visit Pallimulla home I still remember how she ran to and fro like a five-year-old. She did not mind she was a grown up girl," laughs Upasena. "And she still runs. I've hardly seen my wife walking slowly. She is always fast in all her movements," he laughs.

"When I come from office after a hectic day I always get amused by the quick way of her opening the gates for my car to in. I always get a smile on my face when I see her at the gate and that fades away all my exhaustion of the day. She still has the enchanting smile that enticed me then," he laughs. Rupa joins in with a blushing face. "He lies," she chuckles.

Upasena Withana Pathirana was born on September 27 in 1934 at Hulfsdorp, Colombo. His parents were Withana Pathiranage Wickremadasa and Godawatta Liyanage Hinni Nona who moved from Akmeemana, Galle to Colombo.

"With the dawn of the 20th century, a lot of people came to the Colombo city from their villages looking for greener pastures. My father who had a small property in his village also preferred a job in Colombo.

He was a broker who handled labour contracts at the Port. In the 1920s, ships could not move to the harbour, and had to anchored in the outer sea. The goods that were brought in the ships were unloaded to the barges by cranes, and the barges were brought in to the harbour by the pilot boats.

The goods were then unloaded at the harbour, and from there taken to the ware houses and stored. For all these tasks a huge labour force was needed. Hence there were brokers who supplied this force. It was a good business. My father was one of them," reminisces Upasena.

"I can still remember my father filling a powder tin with 50 cent coins which he distributed among his workers every evening. His business flourished until the setting up of Port companies which supplied labourers. So my father lost his job. At the same time the Japanese bombed the Port, so my parents took all of us, my two elder sisters, Shrima and Hema and the younger brother, Wimalasena to Galle," says Upasena.

Upasena's family lived in Galle for about a year and then came back to Aluthkade. It was 1944. Upasena's youngest sister, Prema was born. His father decided to shift to Maradana. "From that time onwards we were living at No.34, 1st Division, Maradana.

Since my father was jobless he joined the Fiscal office as a fiscal guard. To substitute the family income our mother who was a good cook started a catering service at home by giving lunch to the Hulfsdorp Supreme Courts. All the top judges and officials started buying the lunch from us.

The normal lunch was 50 cents and the special lunch was 75 cents. Since she hygienically prepared delicious meals everybody wanted her lunches. This our family income once again increased. We were known as a well-to-do family among our relatives," says Upasena.

Unlike today the biggest madness among youth of that time was to develop desire in leftist community activities. Upasena who was enticed by the social service work took a great liking to it and joined politics amidst strong opposition of his sisters and relatives.

By this time his mother was dead. "My youngest sister was four years when my mother died. I was 14 years. My father also became weak in supporting the family, but our income never felt down as my sisters took over the meal business. They were in their 16s and 15s. They had been helping their mother and knew how to manage by keeping proper accounts. That was a great blessing to us," he pays his gratitude.

Upasena who was nicknamed

Upasena, who was a bilingual maestro became the chief translator on the public stage of the Colombo Central Member of Parliament (MP) Peter Keuneman who delivered his speeches only in English.

In 1956, under the formation of the new public government, Upasena became the Private Secretary of M.S.Themis, Colombo Central third MP. "I was getting a allowance of Rs. 60 per month but I also conducted private English tuition for many children of Chinese families living in the City of Colombo. But my people were not too happy about it. They insisted on my having a permanent job," he reminisces.

Podi Mahattaya was a versatile person, and a trilingual in reading, writing and speaking Sinhala, English and Tamil. "We lived in Maradana, and were associating all communities including Tamils and Muslims. We had a brotherly bond with everybody.

So my father thought it would be useful for us to learn Tamil. So he hired an Indian Tamil teacher to teach us Tamil. This knowledge helped me immensely when I became the Training Manager of the Sri Lanka Insurance Corporation as I conducted lectures in all three languages," he smiles.

"However, it was my brother-in-law (husband of Hema) Rayner Quintus Peiris (who was then an English teacher and later became an English journalist) encouraged me to apply for a post of Insurance Clerk of Sunlight Assurance Company of Canada locally handled by the Delmege Forsyth Company. It was my first exposure to a foreigner, but I smarted all the other six guys at the interview as my family language was English. It was 1959. And it was the beginning of my Insurance career," he says.

Lets zoom back to Rupa who waited patiently to disclose her life story. Serving me and the photographer with the tasty sweet meats; 'Veli Thalapa' and 'Kalu Dodol' made by her, Rupa began to reveal about herself. The beautiful hand work; crotchets, tatins, patchworks, embroideries, cross stitches done by her have won many awards in Provincial and Island wide levels.

The Matara damsel seems really good at her needle work. "We are Matara people, so naturally I've inherited the gift. My mother and her two sisters taught me. I was really lazy then as I wanted to spare more time bathing in the sea, playing with the sand, climbing the trees (even coconut trees), singing and dancing with my younger sister, cousins and friends. I really had a wonderful childhood," she recalls.

Angunna Baddegamage Rupa de Silva was born on November 18 in 1944 to A.B.Charles de Silva, shoe businessman in Pettah and Gimarlina Abeywardane. Rupa was the third to two brothers and a younger sister. "I studied at St.Mary's Convent, Matara and had the Buddhist education at Jayasundararamaya, Pallimulla.

We had a very good disciplinary education both at the convent and the Buddhist Daham School," she recalls. After his first visit to Rupa's place, Upasena who had been in the world of Leftist's politics changed drastically.

Even his older sister Shrima sensed it. She wondered why her brother was humming an old Sinhala film song with so much enthusiasm day and night; 'Pem rella nege gal thalle vedi me sundara sandyave'.... Shrima looked through the bedroom curtain to see 'Podi Mahattaya' standing at the mirror combing his hair with great interest, this was the first time she saw him doing so... Shrima smiled to herself.

At the beginning Rupa was not interested in starting an affair. She still felt she was a child. But Silva Mudalali didn't want to reject the proposal brought for his daughter by Upasena.

By this time, his flourishing shoe business was waning off as he had to give away his rented shop at Pettah to the owner who took legal action against him occupying it. Rupa wanted to further her studies.

Even her two aunties were quite keen in educating her. But finally Rupa changed her mind. She was sympathetic towards Upasena. He had been pleading for her love by making visit after visit from Colombo to Matara. The young Romeo was so romantic that the teenage Juliet could not find an excuse to say 'no' to him anymore. So they entered in to wedlock on April 28 in 1961. Rupa was just about 15 years and nine months and Upasena was 24 years.

However the teenage bride found the life was not going to be a bed of roses any more. But with the love of her husband she was sure she could adjust to the new set up soon. Rupa was good at her hand work, but was terrible in cooking rice and curries.

It was a big challenge for her as she was married to a family of food lovers who even once ran a catering business. But for Rupa's eyes everything and everybody was nice. Her 'chitty witty' tongue and sense of humour never let anybody to fall apart from her.

She would talk two words and the third would be a huge chuckle that would make everybody around her laugh. Her face is always blooming with a smile. That has been the best gift pretty Rupa brought along with her through out her 46 years of married life. "We have faced ups and downs in life, but never let those to fade away the love between us," she smiles.

In 1961, Upasena saw a news item in the papers that Insurance Industry was going to be nationalised. Then Minister T.B.Ilangaratne had brought the Act regarding it, and called for applications from then employees of the Insurance Industry to form the Insurance Corporation. Upasena was the one of the thirty of the first batch recruited.

"Under the 'Colombo Plan', Insurance Actuaries from India visited Sri Lanka to impart us with the necessary knowledge to handle Life Insurance Business. A training of three months was given, and we were placed in various Departments of the Insurance Corporation. In the following year, in 1962 I was transferred to the 'Life Insurance Policy Servicing Section' which provided me a depth of knowledge in Insurance," he recalls.

Upasena has been a dedicated man who would study any subject that makes him interested. The versatile reader could talk hours and hours on any topic, especially of local and international politics. So no wonder he went up in the career ladder.

In 1969, he was promoted as an Administrative Officer and served in the branches of Ratnapura, Negombo and Vaunia. In 1971 he was promoted as the Head of 'Policy Servicing Unit'. When the Insurance Corporation was regionalist Upasena was promoted as the Assistant Regional Manager in Badulla.

Then he became the Regional Manager in Ratnapura, Trincomalee and Kurunegala. In 1986 he went up as the Assistant Training Manager and in 1990 became the Training Manager of his same good old Sri Lanka Insurance Corporation. Upasena retired in 1994. During his service he got a 3 months training in Insurance in Tokyo, Japan.

A few could be on a par with his knowledge in Insurance as Upasena has a half a century of experience in the subject. After his retirement Upasena became a private consultant of Insurance, and became the General Manager and Authorised (Specified) Officer of Brite Insurance Brokers in 1996.

He accepted the same post offered to him at Sanasa Almao Insurance Corporation in 1999, which named subsequently changed as Micro Insurance Brokers. And still he hold that post imparting the nation with the knowledge of Insurance. "I do a lot of translations from English terms to Sinhala to persuade more Sinhalese into Insurance," he smiles.

Upasena and Rupa were blessed with three children, and five grand children. "We are really proud of our children and the children-in-law who look after us well," they boast.

The happy husband and wife are the chief Dayakayas (donors) of the village temple. "We went on the pilgrimage to Dambadiva few years back, and recently our children took us on a Thailand tour," says Rupa. Contentment, peace and happiness; what else does a couple need in their old age.

Helping others and involving in the Buddhist religious activities the Upasena couple live a tranquillised life. "I conduct free classes of needlecraft as I want to impart my knowledge to the younger generation," says Rupa. "I'm in the process of doing an in depth study in Buddhist doctrine," concludes Upasena.

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