‘Love has no barriers’

Apsari speaks of life with former SL cricket captain Hashan Thilakaratne:

“I was not that much of a cricket fan. I had more things to think about. But, I always had a liking to Hashan as he was with a smiling face in all his photographs which appeared in the papers. This made me to think that this cricketer seemed to be a pleasant guy,” recalls Apsari about veteran cricketer cum budding politician, Hashan Thilakaratne.

“It was 1995. I met Hashan at one of my friends, Eshantha’s place. I was working for Emirates and was based in Dubai. The Sri Lanka Cricket team had come there for their Sharjah Tournament, and were invited for a refreshments by Eshantha. It was the first time I met the team. I had a chat with Hashan, it was all about general topics,” says Apsari.

“The pretty Emirates Air Hostess who had an excellent manner carrying herself could not be easily forgotten,” thought the young cricketer who was at his peak during that era. He had seen many girls, beauty queens in all his tours. But, what draws him so much to this young lady, he could not fathom... Finally he decided to call her.

Apsari, a rare model of brains and beauty, first answered to his calls with her usual affable manner. She had no intention of the change that was going to take place in her fate.

“We became friends for sometime and I realised that he was a simple, humble, down-to-earth, caring and loving person. I met him at a few cricket matches played in Sharjah. When he proposed to me, I asked him to meet my family. He was undergoing a series of problems. So, I too thought it was better to get the consent of my parents first,” smiles Apsari.

Ranasinghe Arachchilage Nohoth Sinhabahu Ralalage Deepika Sandamali Apsari Sinhabahu was born on March 8 in 1970 to R.A.S.R. Podi Nilame Sinhabahu and Sheela Fernando at Maharagama. She had her education first at Samudradevi Balika Vidyalaya, Nugegoda and then joined St. Paul’s, Milagiriya from Grade 6.

“I did a bit of swimming and was not keen of sports. Instead I was a very studious student. However, I tried my hand at flower making, cake making and so on while at school,” she smiles.

Apsari was in her A/L class studying Bio-Science when she heard from her friend about the American Field Services which was a students exchange programme. The venue centre was just opposite her school.

“By the time I heard about the programme, it was the closing date for applications. I took an application, filled and handed it over to the centre after school. Since a parent or guardian had to sign there, I got my Principal, Mrs. Pitigala who was always fond of me to sign it. I just applied for it, but never had high hopes about it,” she says.

After three tests including two interviews held by foreign delegates, 30 students including Apsari were selected.

“I was selected to go to Australia. But, this was what happened. My father used to accompany me where ever I went. A lady officer working at this programme centre who noticed me had said this to my father, `Mr. Sinhabahu, I’ve noticed that you are very caring and protective of your daughter. That’s why I’ve thought of telling this to you.

My advice is to send your daughter to Japan as she will come back the same way. Also she can learn the language as an added thing.’ So, my parents and I took her advice, I flew to Japan in 1987,” reminisces Apsari.

“We are loosing another doctor,” laments her Principal when Apsari went to bid farewell to her. Though the programme was for one year, Apsari decided to follow the two year Diploma course.

“Three girls and two boys were selected form Sri Lanka, and altogether there were 300 students at the orientation camp held at Tokyo, which briefed us a basic account of the Japanese culture, language and etiquette. Eating with the two chop sticks was the most difficult thing we encountered,” she recalls.

Every foreign student was given the shelter of foster parents who were to be responsible for their education and other facilities. “We were based in Hiroshima. There were none who knew Sinhala or English. So, we had to learn Japanese somehow. I used to work throughout the night and somehow became fluent in the language with in three months,” she claims.

Her foster parents who didn’t have children of their own became really fond of the courageous pleasant teenager, and didn’t want her to leave.

“Neither did I. But parents wanted me to come back. So, once when my mother phoned and gave me a better idea. She asked me to join Air Lanka, as then I could travel often, and would get the chance to meet my foster parents. Simultaneously I finished my diploma programme and returned back to Sri Lanka,” she says.

Apsari whose dream once was to become a doctor was shipping into a different destiny. While waiting for Air Lanka applications, Apsari joined as a Japanese Guest Relation Officer at Lanka Oberoi in 1989. After six months she accepted the biggest challenge in her fate. Apsari joined the board.

“I have no regrets over leaving higher studies for my job, as everybody go for the education to achieve a better life in the future. I really cherish my life as an Air Hostess. It was a great opportunity as I had more than 50 locations in many countries. It was a great experience. You are like ambassadors of your country, and even at the Airport you have to conduct yourself well,” she says.

Question : Some assume Air Hostesses get a lot of freedom. So, with a well secured background, didn’t you faced objections over becoming an Air Hostess?

Apsari : If you know what you are doing, and how to look after yourself there won’t be any problem. Young women in every field get caught to gossips. So, why only look at Air Hostesses with squint eyes? I assume every girl should

try this opportunity as it gives you many experience. You get opportunity to travel, meet different kind of people, and especially if you are to get married, it would be great, as you get a wonderful chance to shop.

Though looking cheerful and a free bird, a big responsibility was lying on Apsari’s shoulders. “My father worked as a Cinema Hall Manager. He provided us a wonderful and happy childhood. By the time I was in my A/Ls he suffered a terminate illness. He was too feeble to work, so as the eldest of the family, it was I who had to look after my parents and my younger sister. I did it all with great enthusiasm. I could give the best treatment to my father and make him still alive,” claims Apsari. She recalls the first car she bought out of her hard earned money.

Apsari heard of Emirates who was recruiting Sri Lankan girls for Air Hostesses after four years. Among hundreds of applicants, Apsari was the only Sri Lankan selected to Emirates in 1994. “It was a surprise! My mother had delivered the letter sent by Emirates to Katunayake along with the driver who came to pick me up in my car. It changed another leaf in my life,” she smiles. Apsari met Hashan while at Emirates which she had to end within one and half years.

“Hashan wanted to start a happy family life. He was at his peak, and was really busy. It was a deciding point in my life. A big `RISK’ I would say. I had to do the sacrifice, and quit my job. However, I had confidence that Hashan would look after me and my family who were totally depending on my support. Hashan kept his word! And that is the biggest reason for me to respect him,” she recalls.

Question : What was the response you got from your parents over his proposal?

Apsari : My parents had great confidence in me, and they knew I would not take any wrong step. `You have done so much for us. It is your life anyway. But, I know nothing would go wrong in your life. Our blessings are with you, Duwa,’ was my father’s very words uttered to me after Hashan paid a visit to our place.

Question : So.....?

Apsari : So, we came under one roof, and built our own nest (laughs).

Hashan Prashantha Thilakaratne was born on July 14 in 1967 to Raja Thilakaratne, ex-Air Force personnel and Lili Amara Thilakaratne, ex-Central Bank employee. Hashan is the oldest and his younger bother, Yasas Thilakaratne is also a professional cricketer who plays lead cricket for both England and Australia.

Hashan had his primary education at Isipathana College, and then entered D.S.Senanayaka College. He started playing Cricket at the age of nine, and qualified for National level at the age of 19. He first came to prominence with a match-saving century against England B in Galle in 1986 while still at school, and went on to make his first One Day International `Sri Lanka Vs India’ in Sharjah of the same year. He played his first Test match `Sri Lanka Vs Australia’ in Hobart, Australia in 1989.

Wills World Cup in 1996 was a historic victory in Hashan’s Cricket life. He was named the Test captain in April 2003. His last One Day International was with Zimbabwe in Sharjah in 2003, and faced the final Test match with Australia at SSC in Colombo in 2004.

In 2005, The Sri Lankan Cricket Board appointed Hashan as the Executive Director of Cricket Aid, a body formed to provide relief following the Tsunami which occurred in December 2004.

He was bestowed a rare honour when he was conferred with a honourary life membership of the MCC from March 2008. Last May Hashan Thilakaratne was appointed as the President of the Association of Cricket Umpires and Scorers of Sri Lanka (ACUSSL).

Question : Oh! can make a team of your own?

Apsari : Why not? (laughs). Our twins, Duvindu Sachin and Ravindu Sachin were born in 1996, the very day we had our house warming ceremony here at Piliyandala in our newly built house. They are 12 years, studying at S.Thomas College, Mount Lavinia and are very keen in Cricket.

They would relate all the milestones in Thathi’s Cricket career off the bat! Both Hashan and I liked Sachin Tendulkar a lot. That was why we named our twins thus. The third, Rajindu Irvar is two and half years now.

Question : Why do you say `the third’, do you have any idea to add more to your team?

Apsari : Yes (laughs). I love children, and do not mind having even more. But, I prefer a daughter as the fourth.

Question : Hashan is in politics now. How do you see him in his this new role?

Apsari : At first, it did scare me a bit, as both families and friends were quite against it. But, I realised that Hashan has a good vision which he has gained through his experience in sports as a cricketer, captain and an executive member. Some come to politics to earn, but in our case we have enough to live on and have travelled all over the world.

There’s nothing much for us to gain in politics other than self satisfaction by doing social work. Both Hashan and I believe that we have social responsibility to fulfil. That was the very reason he stepped into politics. He will be celebrating his first anniversary today (July 13) as the Chief UNP Organiser of Awissawella Electorate in Colombo District. Co-incidentally his birthday falls tomorrow.

Question : You seem to be giving him the utmost support in all his achievements. At the same time you stated that you have faced many `risks’ and `challenges’ in life.

Apsari : I have faced jealousies and enmity since my childhood. But I have never ever become jealous of anybody as I don’t have to do so. My parents and sister have been with me through out. I’m really happy about my life as everything has fallen perfectly.

I’ve supported my family, and give hundred percent encouragement to my husband in everything he does. I’m gifted with an instinct so that my guesses over things have rarely gone wrong. My next aim is to help Hashan too do something for the people of this country. He has just started, and his aim is not to go to the Parliament tomorrow. There’s a long way for him to tread before that.

Question : In conclusion, what’s your message to the society?

Apsari : Face life with courage and determination. Always have a positive out look while attending to your duties by the family, spouse and society. If you can live according to your conscience, that is the best way to mould your own destiny.