Shop till you drop!

by Samangie WETTIMUNY

Nuwan would tolerate any suggestion made by his pretty and versatile wife Sayuri except one. The moment she says "Let's go shopping!" , he grows pale, looks helpless and miserable ! Having lived with her for the past seven years he is well aware of the consequences of her "shopping expedition".

No matter whether it's a super market, a ready-made garment shop, a saree centre, or a cosmetics outlet, his wife would spend nearly the whole day there. Whatever around her would grab her attention and she soon forgets what her priorities are! She goes on trying each and every item while her impatient husband stands next to her with a trolley filled with unwanted items! Another duty `imposed on' him is to hold her bag while she tries out new outfits in the fitting room! Fed up with all this, he then decides to stay in the car till she returns after her round of shopping.

"But there's no end to my woes." He tells me with a wink and a twitch. "No sooner she returns to the car she starts commenting about what she bought and lamenting over what she had not bought!"

Nuwan is just one of those (in)active members of an active club! They all have different versions of the same story to tell me. Their `helplessness' would make anybody feel that over- shopping is indeed a severe `family issue' which ought to be remedied !

For many women leaving their favourite shopping mall is an unpleasant task. Thirty four year old Samanthi admits that she gets carried away by all the "unwanted goods" that are on display. She also confides in me one of her `secrets'. "Though I normally prepare a list of essential items that I should buy, I normally end up in buying all the least wanted things," she groans. No one would ever expect this versatile accountant to go to the super market to buy spaghetti and mayonnaise cheese, her family's preferred dish for dinner, but to buy French fries, pop corn, cushion covers and artificial flowers instead! It was only after she got into the car that she remembered what had brought her to the supermarket! She went there for the second time to buy spaghetti and rest, and drove back home ,but did not reveal her blunder to anyone. "If my husband and children get to know this, they would make fun of me. My `funny' shopping habits are already a topic among family members and relatives!"

What do you think of Gayatri who bought seventeen handbags during her recent tour of Dubai and yet looks for more, while she was doing shopping in Singapore! Middle-aged, stylish Fathima too never gets fed up of shopping. She says that she still has piles of unused clothes, cosmetics, brand new pairs of shoes and fancy jewellery that she bought from Malaysia last year, but goes on buying the same items until she exceeds her credit card limit. Fathima admits that unless she controls her `itch', she may even be sued over her unpaid credit card balance!

Thirty six year old Sameera does not mind how high the bill is if it does not say "can be exchanged within seven days." According to the young graphic designer, his wife seems to believe that her `shopping expedition' is not `complete' if she does not go back to the shopping mall to exchange at least one of the ready-made garments she bought the other day! He strictly believes that all the ready-made garment stores and saree centres should follow "Once sold, cannot be exchanged" `policy'!

Just like husbands, wives too have complaints about their `unsupportive' husbands. Sakunthala, a twenty-nine year old journalist finds her five year old son a better shopping partner than her husband.

Unlike her impatient husband who simply stands beside her with a long face while she chooses her clothes, her son helps her with the selection process. "He would come to me with a blouse saying "Ammi, this would suit you." He does not mind even waiting there the whole day with me." She is quite sure that her son would make an excellent husband one day!

Another angry wife complained that her husband does not pay any attention to the clothes he wears and as a result she has to select them for him as well. "I am telling you Samangie, he is `weird' when it comes to his clothes. Very insensitive. He would wear a crushed shirt and a tie which does not suit the shirt's colour. To avoid embarrassment I have decided to buy those things for him." She does not certainly mind buying things for her hubby if he is at least a little flexible. He never wants to get down from the car to join her, would drop her at the shopping mall and `vanishes' and cannot be traced until he returns to pick her up several hours later!

Wives who simply browse shops with no intention to buy, too gain no sympathy from their angry husbands. Some husbands do find `window shopping' even worse than`overshopping'! Middle aged Athula too seems to be fed up with his wife's `odd' shopping habits. She keeps on visiting shops until very late without having any idea of what to buy.

"Though she spends nearly the whole day in shopping malls, she would come out empty-handed when I go there to pick her up." She would then `demand' him to drop her at another venue, but would commit the same blunder. When asked what exactly she wants to buy she would just keep quiet, if he raises the question again and again she would retort "I should go and have a look first to decide on what to buy. If you cannot spend a few hours for me, just let me get down from the car."

There are so many guys who loiter in their favourite shopping centres in Colombo. Some guys would even spend the entire day in DVD shops and video centres, selecting heaps of DVDs. Thirty two year old Nadunika says that her husband is in the habit of buying expensive phones almost every other week ignoring family priorities. "Does not this type of behaviour too fall into the same category?" She queries. "Men often try to label women as `over-shoppers' simply because they spend extra on ready made garments, Sarees or cosmetics, but tend to overlook their frailties."

Nadunika who believes that the term "Over shopping" should be redefined, at the same time admits that she has already exceeded her credit card limits and it is her husband who pays most of her bills! Tips to prevent over shopping may suggest you to ask yourself a few questions before commencing your `shopping expedition'.

However much they ask themselves "why you are there, whether you really need that particular goods, how you are going to pay for them, where will you put them , what if you wait", they will still be coming out of their favourite shopping malls carrying loads of unwanted goods to find a `fuming' husband at the wheel!

(Names have been changed)