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Sunday, 18 September 2011

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Monkey Business

A tourist walks into a pet shop in the city and looks around the cages on display. While he is there, another customer walks in and said to the shopkeeper, "I'll have a C monkey, please".

The shopkeeper nods, goes over to a cage at the side of the shop and takes out a monkey. He fits a collar and gives the monkey to the customer, saying "That'll be $5,000". The customer paid and walked away with his monkey.

Startled, the tourist goes over to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey and most of them are only a few hundred dollars. Why did it cost so much?" The shopkeeper said "that monkey can program in C with very fast, tight code, no bugs, well worth the money." The tourist starts to look at the monkeys in the cage. He says to the shop keeper, "That one is even more expensive, $10,000! What does it do?" "That one is a C++ monkey; it can manage object-oriented programing, Visual C++, even some Java, all the useful stuff", the shopkeeper said.

The tourist looks round for a little longer and sees a third monkey in a cage on its own.

The price tag round its neck says $50,000. He gasps and tells the shopkeeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?" "Well," says the shopkeeper, "I don't know if it actually does anything, but says it is a Consultant. Comedy Zone


Sad story

Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 storey sky scraper. After a long day of meetings they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to the room. Bill said to Jim and Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can tell sad stories the rest of the way.

At the 26th floor Bill stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories. "I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!". funshun


The job requirement

A job applicant went for his first interview at the ABC Company. The HR manager of the company asked several questions about the applicant and his educational qualifications. Then HR manager explained the responsibilities of the post and said, "In this job we need someone who is responsible." Then the applicant said, "I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible." funshun

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