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| Sunday, 1 December 2002 |
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"Off with his head! Off with his head!' That was Quince, and then Bottom with:'Off with all their heads!To the Tower we will go! Heigh ho! Here comes Robin and his men!' 'Who are all those heads going to roll?' asked one of the Hood's righthand men. 'Why, all those who are trying to undermine the Royal family and are even in fact trying to do away with it completely,' replied Quince.'Have a referendum,'someone suggested, but that suggestion was shouted down by a hundred or more lusty male voices who said that the majority is not always right. 'Down with those who are trying to do away with our royals.Elizabeth is queen and so she will remain until the Almighty's decision to take her away from this most wicked of all worlds,' they shouted in unison, shaking their fists at the absent enemy and vowing to do vengeance on all detractors of the Royal family. Then Robin spoke; all eyes and ears were focussed on the handsome figure in Lincoln green, with a green cap and a russet feather stuck jauntily in it. "Our King Richard is in the Holy Land now on his Crusades. When he is back in a few months time, he will also join the Crusade right here to fight those who are trying to undermine our Royal family',Robin said. Everyone crossed themselves at the mention of the Almighty and bent the knee at the mention of King Richard. Suddenly there was heard the sound of horses' hooves approaching the gathering. The light grew dimmer-it was still daytime-and then there came into view Merlin the visionary from the camp of King Arthur, his owl on his shoulder. There was a loud cheer from the whole gathering; Merlin was very popular with everyone, as was King Arthur himself. The owl blinked and blinked but did not hoot. 'Greetings from the king to one and all!'said the visionary. 'He knows exactly what is going on and has vowed to battle with all enemies of the royals, be they powerful politicians or commonfolk. But all politicians are the commonfolk,' Bottom said in an undertone to Quince who could hardly stifle a giggle, but all not within Merlin's hearing. 'Now how could Merlin have made a slip like that?' asked Puck who was always somewhere nearby on such occasions. And with that he went off to tweak Merlin's owl by the tail in a playful gesture. Puck loved all animals and birds and when he wished, could even take on the appearance of one. 'These people will be wiped out,' Merlin said. "When King Richard returns from Jerusalem he will address both the Lords and the Commons in an unprecedented step, on the importance of preserving our Royal family.' 'We are prepared to take to the streets and fight if there are any further rumblings against the House of Windsor,' said Robin who was always ready for a good fight, especially with swords, in which he excelled. 'To war! To war!' shouted Friar Tuck,lifting up one end of his cassock with one hand and shaking his fist ferociously. 'But not before a good roast venison and several ppints of ale!' he added, sending the whole meeting into merry laughter. 'Royalty cannot be done away with,' said Merlin seriously. 'It was only one thousand seven hundred years ahead that they held a unique ceremony in distant Sri Lanka which had kings for several centuries. The ceremony was held with great ceremonial-it was a Pledge of Loyalty to the best college in that country named Royal,' Merlin continued. The prime miinister of the country who is himself a great Royalist led the ceremony which was an historic one in the annals of the great educational institution.' The owl's eyes glinted and a great cheer went up into the royal blue sky of the forest, while Puck actually perched himself on Merlin's other shoulder and tweaked the owl's tail from behind Merlin's back. 'Indeed, that unique Pledge of Loyalty should inspire us right here and now to pledge our own loyalty to our queen,'said Oberon, king of the Forest, at his most regal, his robes of green and gold glinting in the afternoon sunlight. Another great cheer went up and the owl flapped his wings while Merlin stroked his long white beard and everyone was happy. It was the perfect moment for Bottom and Friar Tuck who were really some centuries apart, to demand that there be a celebration, starting immediately, to mark the events of the day, especially the Pledge. 'But before we celebrate, we have to send our warmest greetings and respect to King Arthur,' said Ob.'Quince, will you prepare an e-mail at once and send it off to Cornwall where the king is holding court right now with his Knights of the Round Table?' Robin offered to send off the e-mail by arrow into the year 500 and something AD;his arrows never fail to hit their target. In fact, he would direct the arrow with the attachment right spot-on at the Round Table so that the king could send back his fax or e-mail immediately. 'After conferring withhis knights,' of course, said Merlin, half in jest. 'Of course,' said Ob. 'And now, let's get the celebrations going,said Bottom who danced a merry dance with Tuck at the thought of roast venison,swan pasties and lots and lots of wine and ale with which they would drink toasts to every king and queen who ever sat-or will sit in the distant future-on the throne of any country in the world. And it being the first of December, they also toasted the merry month of Christmas -Titania |
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