What freedom and real freedom means.....

"Real freedom is of the mind and spirit; It can never come to us from out side" Rabindranath Tagore

Unslavish attitudes are most important in the process of personal development. If you are completely free from others' influence, there are no barriers to hinder you. You should be able to stand on your feet whenever you need to make any crucial decision in life.

Depending on others will increase your anxiety and stress and, you will often face difficulty in making decisions. After the decision is made, if you have any doubt on the out come, you may accuse the person of misguidance. It would lead to stress.

You are not a ready made product. You have become what you are today through past actions and thoughts. Your own thinking and ability to make decision on your own would have made you perfect. It will strengthen your holistic character.

Others do not know what your capabilities are. Every person has his set of talents, ability, skills, and choices. You will be successful in doing what you love to do, and you must have the freedom to do that. It needs your heart and soul to interest you.

Think of something which you were not interested, which some one else want you to do. You might have done it without taking much care. So, by letting others decide what you would be will take you nowhere.

There're many examples in society of such nature. A common example is when students want to pursue their studies, parents want them to select the subjects according to parents wishes or what parents would like their children to do and be. And not the subjects which children like.

When they find it difficult to manage subjects which they are incapable of doing, they are bogged down midway and it ruins their future. I have seen many students like that.

They regret by looking at their results. I met one of the students recently who has just received her A/L results. "I wanted to choose Arts subject for my A/Ls. Do you know, when I filled my application I requested Arts subjects.

But my father didn't sign the application till I wrote science subjects in it. What to do? I had to unwillingly choose science subjects and ultimately I failed the A/L exam. If I had to take up Arts or Commerce subjects I could have passed and entered university and even obtained a rank at national level.

She drew a long sigh and murmured something more. My friends who did Arts got through the exam and were selected to enter university. I did much better than them at O/Ls. See what my fate did to me. I'm not giving up. I'm getting ready for the A/L next year in the Arts stream. In vain I wasted two years in my life".

That was the pathetic story unfolded by a student who had to comply with her parents' choice. But, it doesn't mean that you don't have to listen to your parents. They might take good decisions in your life. But as long as you feel that you can take better decisions in your life or you can asses yourself about what you're capable of doing, you will not have to depend on others' decisions. But remember if you're not mature enough to make decisions on your own, it is always advisable for you to seek an elders' help.

Let yourself be the master of your fate

You have to be the master of your fate not someone else. Some people think that everything happens with the will of Almighty God, they say "Let it happen to the will of God". That attitude is okay, because you believe in unseen power. But when you are going to believe in and act according to visible powers, you will not be able to reveal your real ability.

The possibility of being misguided and lost is high. People will come to you advising to do things which you are incapable of doing and which are unfitting. The result will be artificiality, unhappiness and destruction of your own being. They might try to take you in to their taste and mannerisms. Why to live in someone else's dream?

You are unique, no one has been like you in the past and no one will be like you in future. So don't force yourself to blindly follow and imitate others. Go forth according to your own conscience and disposition.

Trying to live according to someone's desires and to creep in to someone else's personality is like akin to suicide. To imitate the characteristics of others is like delivering a death blow to your own self.

Are we free to do what we like?

Sri Lanka became colonised in 1505 and people lost their freedom of doing what they wanted to do. They were compelled to do what they disliked. We gained the freedom in 1948 again. But still we seem to have not gained the freedom for ourselves.

Some of us are still living in the way how other people want us to live. Is this the freedom of yourself? Though we are going to celebrate our freedom, we should ask ourselves whether we have got the real freedom in ourselves to do things which we like and not things others impose on us.