Gentlemanly gestures
 Let her sit down first
In days gone by, it was considered appropriate for a gentleman to
pull out a chair for his lady. Nowadays, this is considered a little bit
too formal. As a gentlemanly gesture, you should instead ensure that
your lady sits down before you do.
Remaining standing for that fraction
longer is a mark of respect and good manners, even if she doesn’t
consciously notice it. Again, this should be done in a non-ostentatious
way.
Don’t make it too obvious that you are waiting for her to sit down.
If you need to buy time, try hanging your coats up while she sits down.
 Watch your language
A very important point which is increasingly overlooked in the modern
world, inappropriate language is not acceptable on a date. A gentleman
should pride himself on being erudite and articulate, and be capable of
expressing himself without resorting to crude vocabulary.
Not only does this demonstrate intelligence, but it also indicates
that you have high standards for yourself and for the people you are
around. This rule can be extended to include using overly long words
that you don’t even understand. Nothing will make you look more foolish
than using a malapropism in an attempt to show off.
 Walk outside on the sidewalk
The origins of this classic yet underused sign of being a gentleman
are fascinating. By keeping her on the inside in earlier times, she
would remain under the overhanging second floor balcony, which would
prevent a chamber pot from being emptied on her head.
It also kept her away from the traffic, while ensuring that any
effluent in the open sewers would not be thrown onto her dress by a
passing carriage. While sewage is less of an issue today, it is still
good form to protect a woman from puddles and traffic.
Intelligent women may even understand the chivalry in this gesture.
Now that you know, there is no excuse for missing this. You can even
impress her with some esoteric trivia if she does mention it.
 Carry the umbrella
Another excellent gentlemanly gesture: Holding the umbrella to keep a
lady dry is a great way to demonstrate your excellent conduct. A
gentleman should always be prepared for inclement weather, and a good
quality umbrella is an essential tool in your armory.
If there is a chance of rain, take the umbrella. If the heavens open,
you demonstrate forethought and planning, and show an ability to take
care of others. Hold the umbrella above her head, and make sure that she
does not get wet. If you are getting wet, you must sacrifice your own
comfort as part of your gentlemanly gesture.
 Walk her home
Walking a lady home is an extremely important component of
gentlemanly conduct. It may take you out of your way, but ensuring she
gets home safely is your first priority. She will feel safer at the end
of the evening if she knows she will be accompanied right to her front
door, which will score you big points.
You can risk losing those points, however, if you make the terrible
mistake of expecting a reward for your efforts. It is her prerogative to
decide whether anything happens at the doorstep. If she lingers, that
may be an invitation to go for a kiss, but never expect anything to
happen.
Contd…next week
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