Destiny’s favourite child

I may not be Destiny’s favourite child, / But I have no doubt I am one of a kind. / Of my imperfections I am not blind, / But in my strengths I do take pride. / I am what I am. I have nothing to hide. / I am my favourite. Even I am surprised. / Don’t be narcissistic. My elders sermonise. / Love yourself Is my motto in life. / So I move with Confidence in my stride.

~ Mamta Agarwal, freelance writer, editor, and poet from India.

Man: destiny’s dearest child, is also the maker of his destiny. It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in our selves. However, once made and propelled into motion, man has no control over its course, its path.

Destiny is a name, often given in retrospect, to choices that had dramatic consequences for man.

Thus, the path that destiny had allotted for him, is the path his hand has forged and fashioned. That which we manifest is before us. We are the creators of our own destiny, be it through intention or ignorance.

Our successes and our failures have been brought on by none other than ourselves. Hence, destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for; but a thing to be, achieved.

There are winds of destiny that blow when we least expect them. Sometimes they gust with the fury of a hurricane; and at other times, they barely fan one’s cheek; but those winds cannot be denied, bringing as they often do a future that is impossible to ignore, and impossible to know. Therefore, once fate has been fashioned by the doing and undoing of man’s actions; adapt yourself to the things among which your lot has been cast, and love sincerely the fellow creatures with whom, destiny has ordained that you shall live.

What we call our destiny is truly our character; and that character can be, altered. The knowledge that we are responsible for our actions and attitudes does not need to be discouraging, because it also means that we are free to change our destiny. One is not in bondage to the past, which has shaped our feelings: to family, race, inheritance, background, and many other attitudes.

All this, our attitudes can be altered if we have the courage to examine how it formed us. We can alter the chemistry provided we have the courage to dissect the elements. What is the point of man having free will, if one cannot, occasionally, spit in the eye of destiny. Our life can be what we make of it.

Destiny

Our destiny and the way we live our life is in our hands. Yet too often, we take the easy road and forget that how we conduct our life, what we do and achieve, is entirely up to us. The list of names of who have risen from the depths of poverty to gain fame, fortune, and public recognition, is very long indeed. They have not looked for excuses but found a way to overcome their disadvantages, create their destiny, and moved on. They did not wait for destiny to change their fate. They forged and formed, made and shaped their destiny.

Having cloned themselves to prominence, some men lose their mind because of fame: that is also their destiny. Such people are unable to make their ego porous.

They understand not, that the will is of little importance, if intentions are ill found; and that, in the presence of destiny, pride is nothing, fame is nothing. That openness, patience, receptivity, solitude, is everything. They do not understand the meaning of fame, of greatness, of immortality; they know not that immortality is not, never dying.

Our hope of immortality does not come from anywhere; but from that hope, and the resultant actions. Albert Einstein used to say, “If my theory of relativity is proven successful, Germany will claim me, as a German; and France will declare me a citizen of the world. Should my theory prove untrue, France will say that I am a German, and Germany will declare that I am a Jew.” Thus, he knew his destiny and immortality depended on the correctness or not of his theory and he worked tirelessly to ensure that his theory was, proven correct. On the other hand, we know of instances closer home where having lost their sense to fame - not having created fame but fame having found them - they create misery to all.

That also will turn to be their destiny; and prove that fame is not everything. Destiny is like a two-sided knife: good actions will produce favourable results, good destiny; whilst the opposite is also true.

Not everybody can be famous but everybody can be great, because greatness is, determined by service. In the finality of life, what matters is simple, genuine goodness; and that is the best capital, upon which to found the business of life. It lasts when fame and money fail, and is the only riches we can take out of this world with us.

Since we are the children of our own destiny, it is time we stopped being pawns; and determined our destiny as deemed fit.

Consequences

The problem, as told in an earlier article, is not the problem. We are the problem. Our inabilities, our ego, our biased minds, our illogicalities, all work against us.

In our eagerness to be the complete man, we embrace anger, pride, jealousy, fear, selfishness, passion. Sometimes, the way we create our destiny, affects the destiny of those near and dear to us. Thus, destiny can become, and at times is, interdependent, mutually dependent.

Today, the mission of one person can be, accomplished only by recognising that we live in an interdependent world with conflicts and overlapping interests.

It is equally true that we live in an unjust world; but in spite of it all, the main cause of our failure is our incapability to treat the other person, another human being, as an equal human and empathise.

We make decisions that affect people’s lives with drastic consequences; yet we have no understanding of the reality of that person’s life whom we have power over. That person then becomes another case, a mere statistic, a pawn, in the ideological beliefs and values of a society whose interests do not reflect these persons interests; because they have no power to determine there own destiny. This is as true of an individual, as for a nation.

In our endeavour to create our separate and sometimes common destiny, let us first become men of principle, and integrity.

Let not acrimony and rancour, be the hallmark of our actions. Let human rights and the just rule of law with an equal place under the Sri Lankan sun for every Sri Lankan create the space for our individual and separate destinies. We cannot go back, ever. We cannot change the past. It just is our destiny. But we can change our future, and indeed we need to change it towards a destiny that will see the dawn of happiness, joy, and goodness for all. Let our actions be rooted in the likeness of the differences of customs, traditions, beliefs.

Hence, let us sow the seeds of a destiny which will bear their fruits to be, gathered through the length and breath of time to come. In that way, let us make visible the fundamental goodness with which destiny has evolved man: destiny's favourite child.

See you this day next week. Until then, keep thinking; keep laughing. Life is mostly about these two activities. For views, reviews, encomiums, and brickbats:

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