(Circles of Fire)

Agni Chakra

(Chapter 9)

By Kathleen JAYAWARDENE

Translated by Ranga Chandrarathne and Edited by Indeewara Thilakarathne

Once Tolstoy said," The greatness or meanness of a literary creation depends on the honesty of its creator". Silently I served some mushroom curry onto the plate. It reminded me that Shantha had been reading Tolstoy's biography for the last couple of days. I now knew where she wanted to lead the conversation. Today, a national newspaper reported that Warusavithana's novel would be given a prestigious literary award.

I served myself a couple of rice-flour string hoppers while tasting the mushroom curry. I thought that Shantha's interest in both reading and culinary art were commendable. I couldn't really figure out how and when this mix had come into being. Shantha who managed time well, excelled in traditional culinary art as well. Among many of her dishes, the mushroom curry was particularly delicious.

"Is it because of your foreword that Warusavithana's book got the award...!"

I began to twist string hoppers with an indifferent smile. She was ignorant of the huge changes taking place and of cultural globalisation. She did not concern herself with the onset of swift globalisation through Information Technology, nor with the concept of profit at the centre of global consumerist culture.

"Those who have applied for loans from Warusavithana might be on the panel of judges..."

I thought that would definitely be the case.

"The world is changing", I summed up it in four words.

Shantha is very intuitive about many issues. That which she sees as the tip of the iceberg is actually the submerged part. Yet she is still ignorant as to how to apply that intuition. I felt that the 'truth' and 'ideals' which made up her world acted as impediments to progress.

"I really don't know if anyone who is simply literate can become a writer. Ven. Kotahene Pagnganakithti thero wrote in 'Literature and Society' 'One should not think of becoming a writer with a little knowledge, a pen and a heap of paper' "

I gazed at the floating clouds beyond the window. I too knew that there were categories of established academics and non-established sages. That's how very often Shantha came out with thought -provoking, intellectual ideas that were far more insightful than those presented by established academics on television and in the papers.

Her wide ranging understanding, confined to the four walls of the house, were mature enough to be presented to society. Yet the authority to present them belonged to me. Was it not her very own 'truth' and 'consicience' that prevented her from reaching the top ?

I recently read in an article in a newspaper which claimed that even a person suffering from psychosis (due to bio-chemical reactions in the brain) or someone suffering from a psychological disorder, could become an academic by gaining knowledge and passing exams.

The psychologist who wrote this article that sent shock waves through me, stated that there may be unwise academics and wise people among the uneducated. He stressed the danger of society accepting the ideas of such academics on account of their qualifications. I could imagine how many of these academics suffer from psychological disorders caused by genetic factors. Is society ready to accept ideas on social issues, from a handful of academics as gospel truth? Would that not be absurd? Could a shrewd person not reach heights of material prosperity by exploiting that absurdity?

"I don't know what would become of literature if things remain as they are today!"

As Shantha did not listen to me, I did not think to explain that in this cultural climate, the inevitable result of social evolution, literary activists would rise above creative writers: That cultural hegemony was fast spreading beyond national borders within the global community.

Neither had I any desire to engage in a long and profitable conversation with her. I was in the habit of being indifferent even when Shantha put forward very important ideas. I was careful not show through my facial expressions that those ideas sometimes impressed themselves upon me, as though they were inscriptions on a stone tablet.

Yet my attitude towards university students was entirely different. I listened eagerly to them and often considered their boring questions, arguments and ideas: Or else I tried to convince them that I was really listening. There were a lot of students who rallied around teachers that actively supported radical ideas and contraversial views. I understood this phenomenon. This student contingent was very important in the march towards victory within the university.

"I told Victor to allocate some space in the plan for a roof-top-garden. By tomorrow, the first part of the loan will be released." I told her, so as to divert the subject, as well as to indicate that we should be grateful to Warusavithana. Yet Shantha considered 'reciprocation' as the ideal and identified this as 'back-scratching'.

"There should be a roof-top-garden. Then at least, we could look at the sky at our leisure!" Shantha said, avoiding what I was trying to direct her towards. I emptied the glass of water in one go. I felt this mysterious look appear on my face. For a while I tightened my lips around the glass in order to cover up its appearance.

"Why cant these people read books with a free mind?"

"Because people don't live according to their conscience" I said wiping my hand with a serviette. Though Shantha deliberately looked into my eyes, I avoided them.

"Why don't people live according to their consciences? "

"Those who live according to conscience are not men but animals", I said in not a very serious tone. A smile flickered across my face.

"Those wild animals would pounce upon a man as soon as they spotted him, for they are honest. They act on the spur of the moment, according to their consciences. Yet are we like them?"

Though Shantha tried to answer, I quickly got up. I walked swiftly into the courtyard, looking at my wrist watch in feigned haste. As I started the engine, I wondered whether I was showing Shantha an exaggerated persona. Or was I trying to rebuild my own lost personality? I knew that I was not the only person not to engage in long discussions with his wife.

I noticed some of my friends who had chatted readily with their fiancées before marriage, now behaved like hermits around their wives.

Did they behave in this manner because 'when marriage comes in the door, love flies out the window'? On the other hand, who was able to identify fiancée and wife as one in the same person?