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Who tempers-temperance

This scribbler along with one of his fellow scribes thirsting for a cool larger walked into an upmarket hostelry only to be told sorry no liquor served today, its World Temperance Day.

What caught the eye was a sign saying at there will be a private function that evening. The following day we were aghast to hear that the party was to promote an yet to be constructed condo targeted for end 2008.

That evening the liquor flowed like the Mahaweli every which way one looked, as one wag commented "what a lovely temperance day, doing bending of elbows". How Dharmishta or Adharmishta are these tenets decreed in aid of booze less days - but let it be the rule for all, not for some or a few......

***

Be mindful of the outflow

FDI or direct foreign investment is most assuredly the need of the hour, with promotion of same going on apace.

However, one of our largest apparel manufacturers and exporters has signed up to start a massive industrial complex in Andhra Pradesh. Furthermore our largest biscuit manufacturer has a plant set up and functioning in Chennai, and has secured the high accolade of being ranked India's third largest biscuit manufacturer.

Are we taking over there?? Just kidding.

***

Chip for Job

Chadrika Bandaranaike Kumaratunge, the President who was, is now said to be applying for a job. Its hard being unemployed.

It's within the UN system.

A little bird tells us that the UN had asked the President, Mr Rajapakse for a referral.

Ooops. Hmm, we'll see..........

****

Punny

The puns on a possible JVP UNP union, and the successful UNP-SLFP union are legion.

But the best ones are those that draw from the Sinhala marriage traditions - deega, binna and eka ge kema. They say: The SLFP is now eka ge kanawa.......(......displaying tendencies of polyandry?........) and UNP has binna behela (..........settled down at the wife's place.......)

***

In the dark

The President turned up for the Karunaratne Abeysekerea memorial event recently, and the entrance was so incognito - the man next to him did not know who was his neighbor.But guess what they were singing when he came in:

"Master Sir, when shall this tug o' war ever end?"(!!!)

***

Thomiana triple gem

Recently the Old Thomian group of 60 or those near to it or just past it had a rollicking time with their better halves and old chums at a get together.

Come time for addresses it was an old Royalist who lit up the place with his presence by invitation, and his delivery with classic oratorical skill and wit. He is none other than Jebs who was formerly with the Attorney Generals Department and who hails from a noble family of accomplished lawyers.

Jebs targeted Thanga who is now a senior DIG going on to recall how Thanga during his schooldays hardly studied but spent his time punching and jabbing his opponents in the face as a Stubbs shield boxer.

Thereafter Thanga had given degrees of a different sort to those who were summoned to the fourth floor when he was ASP in charge of criminal investigations! (Or so Jebs said.) Now having turned a new leaf Thanga has become a self-taught passed-out Attorney heading up the legal department at police headquarters.

Next to be highlighted was the long John of the Tea trade who is known to friends and the corporate sector as Michael-Jean, who was not much scholastically bent, but went on to achieve greatness in the tea trade.Suddenly overcome by pangs of conscience Long John has taken to the credo that of the Holy Grail preaching the Word, though sans flapping wings and halo around his thinning grey springy hair.

Jebs also brought the house down pondering how Glennie Lakshman who walked away with every conceivable prize for scholastic achievement at every annual college prize giving could ever conceivably contract politically with madam.

Everyone wonders how Ivanoff not from the house of Romanoff will retort to this wiseacre called Jebs - and his particular anecdote on the not dancing queen ala abba, but a vengeful queen as stated by none other than Ivanoff.

 

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