Communicate courage

Before Prabhakaran and his cohort were stamped out people in Sri Lanka lived in fear of bomb blasts. Mothers warned their children leaving for school to be careful of unattended parcels and suspicious people. Children went to school nevertheless without thinking too much of disasters.

If parents and children stayed at home for fear of bombs, life would have come to a standstill. So, they went on about their business hiding their fears in a corner of their hearts. Today they can heave a sign of relief because the Government has put an end to the root cause of their fears.

Although we no longer fear bomb blasts, we still have other fears. For instance, fatal diseases and accidents can be added to the list of our recurring fears. Therefore, mothers still warn their children, "Be careful" when their children leave home for school. If children took this advice seriously they would end up as neurotics because they will not be able to cross busy roads or walk into a hospital for fear of accidents and catching a disease.

Psychologists believe that fear in man cannot be eradicated completely. Everyone has some kind of fear such as fear if heights, snakes, lonely pots, diseases, and germs. However, they advice that we should keep our fears to ourselves. In other words, we should not communicate our fears to others.

Instead of communicating fear, it is always advisable to communicate courage. Once I saw a mother residing in the city leaving her child at a halt to board a bus saying, "Have a nice time". The child ran to the waiting bus and waved to her mother joyfully. However, most of our mothers still warn their children to be careful and pray to numerous Gods to protect them. Talk to any doctor, counsellor or psychologist and they would tell you how people suffer from fear psychosis. Some of these fears are related to health, marriage, career, and education. It appears that we are gripped by fear at every corner. Although we cannot get rid of fear so easily we can stop communicating fear to others.

Media too communicate fear to us all the time. The recent news that some Indian students have been attacked in Australia would have prevented many Indian parents from sending their children to that country. However, you cannot blame the media for disseminating news. They are simply doing their job. But it is up us not to be frightened by such reported events. We must have the courage to move forward - not backward.

Like fear, courage too is contagious. If you communicate courage, you will be rending a great service to society and to yourself. Think of an Army Commander who warns his soldiers to be careful in fighting. If that happens he and his men are bound to be defeated. Even in the face of imminent death soldiers have to remain courageous. Our experience is that soldiers never run away from trouble spots. They spread courage and face any eventually. That is the secret of their success.

Even in the battle of lifer fear does not pay. It is courage that will pay you rich dividends. Many employees, for instance, have some fear of losing their jobs due to recession or some other reason. If they are gripped by fear, they will not be able to discharge their duties properly. Excessive self-revelation of fear can be dangerous at times. For instance, a man who always fears that he might die of cancer is conditioning his mind and body to that disease. Similarly, if you have excessive fear of accidents, you will not be able to drive a vehicle. Even if you do so, you will annoy other road users by trying to drive very slowly.

Then what are we going to do when we are burdened with fear? According to a noted psychologist, our bodies respond to fear and danger with a number of involuntary reactions. We have inherited these involuntary reactions from our distant ancestors. In an emergency our immediate reaction is to fight or flee.

When this alarm system is in operation, we do not have to worry too much about fear. Sometimes you may wish to unburden yourself by revealing your fears to a trusted friend.

On the surface, this appears to be a salutary process. However, if you start pouring your heart out, you will only be wallowing in self-pity. Nobody will want to keep company with someone who is eternally complaining about fears some of which may be purely imaginary.

As the world is full of various kinds of fears, nobody can live without them. However, communicating fear serves no purpose. Therefore, it is always good to communicate courage and become a useful citizen.